this post was submitted on 27 Aug 2024
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xkcd

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The secret fourth kind is 'we applied a standard theory to their map of every tree and got some suspicious results.'

https://explainxkcd.com/2977/

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[–] Hamartiogonic@sopuli.xyz 62 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (1 children)

Then there’s also the flat-earther style: “We applied a flawed model and flawed methodology to standard circumstances and got the results we wanted!”

I guess we need a new comic to address all the different kinds of pseudo-science.

[–] NegativeInf@lemmy.world 25 points 10 months ago

That's easy! We call that Garbage In Garbage Out!

[–] ShinkanTrain@lemmy.ml 56 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (2 children)

What about 'we applied a standard theory to standard circumstances and somehow the results aren't right and it's probably our fault'

[–] Hamartiogonic@sopuli.xyz 13 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Business as usual, just another day at the lab. People using actual real world samples instead of the expensive standards to produce a very messy calibration squiggle. Also, the machine probably requires some maintenance from time to time.

[–] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.world 14 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Should just assume a perfectly spherical cow in a vacuum for simplicity's sake 🤷

[–] palordrolap@fedia.io 12 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Oddly enough, the lack of air pressure in a vacuum would have the effect of trying to turn a regular cow into a sphere.

(Do not do this. Not even if the cow is already dead. Thanks.)

[–] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.world 6 points 10 months ago

Do not do this.

Dammit, there goes my weekend! Oh well, guess I can still just eat that dead cow that's been taking up space in the lab 🤷

[–] Cryophilia@lemmy.world 11 points 10 months ago (2 children)

The most exciting phrase to hear in science, the one that heralds new discoveries, is not “Eureka!” but “That’s funny …”

[–] dave@feddit.uk 12 points 10 months ago (1 children)
[–] trolololol@lemmy.world 4 points 10 months ago

My favorite is the one on fire

[–] ShinkanTrain@lemmy.ml 6 points 10 months ago

Not to be confused with "is it supposed to be making a noise", which is usually pretty bad

[–] The_v@lemmy.world 35 points 10 months ago (2 children)

The one I see the most is:

"We avoided any semblance of rational experimental design and got significant results."

[–] Agent641@lemmy.world 14 points 10 months ago

We were awarded grant money from a corporation and got results that are favourable to them but require further grants to really boost that evidence up a notch, wink wink

[–] Hamartiogonic@sopuli.xyz 6 points 10 months ago

If all else fails, use "significant at a p>0.05 level" and hope no one notices.

source: xkcd

[–] PlexSheep@infosec.pub 15 points 10 months ago (1 children)

There is also "We did nothing of value"

[–] Agret@lemmy.world 9 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Aka "we applied a standard theory to standard circumstances and got the expected result" - one can argue it does help in a way by providing another dataset although it didn't really accomplish anything it can be useful for student research projects in that field.

[–] PlexSheep@infosec.pub 2 points 10 months ago

No I meant wasting time with useless stuff

[–] Mubelotix@jlai.lu 12 points 10 months ago (2 children)
[–] PlexSheep@infosec.pub 1 points 10 months ago (1 children)

I'm afraid tree mapping isn't yet in it

[–] Mubelotix@jlai.lu 1 points 10 months ago

It is. But it groups trees that are next to each other. You can add a single tree in the "Things" overlay

[–] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.world 11 points 10 months ago

Content notice on explainxkcd:

This explanation may be incomplete or incorrect: Created by a DEPTH-FIRST TREE SEARCHER

😄

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 10 points 10 months ago

Don't forget "these are novel circumstances and so we attempted something, but really the circumstances are so novel that just documenting them is pretty neat"

[–] metaStatic@kbin.earth 6 points 10 months ago

We applied a map of every tree to a set of all possible sets we're waiting on the results