this post was submitted on 31 Oct 2025
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[–] JoMiran@lemmy.ml 167 points 1 week ago (6 children)

Actual conversation I had regarding my sexuality:

Femal Aquaintance- "You can't be bi, you're married! Wait...do you cheat on -=wife=-?!?"

Me - "Of course I can, and no I don't cheat."

Female Aquaintance - "But you're married! Doesn't -=wife=- have a problem with it?"

Me - "No. She's bi too."

Female Aquaintance -"But she's married!!!"

Two weeks later she got drunk and wanted a threesome, then got annoyed that we turned her down. I have no idea why people immediately assume that bi means "will fuck anyone that asks".

[–] JillyB@beehaw.org 37 points 1 week ago (2 children)

My mom met a non-binary friend of mine and their girlfriend. My NB friend comes across as a masculine muscular bro dude but their NB and pan. I mentioned to my mom later that they were NB and she was like "but he has a girlfriend...?" I had to walk her through "you've heard of men being attracted to women, and women being attracted to women. Well Zack is neither and is attracted to women." In her mind, gender and sexuality were like, part of the same thing. Which I guess they are but not the way she thought.

[–] EldritchFeminity@lemmy.blahaj.zone 25 points 1 week ago (2 children)

I had to teach the difference between the two to my therapist the first time I talked about being trans.

The upside to that whole thing being that they ended up using my knowledge as a launching point to learn what the latest research has to say about gender, sexuality, and trans people, and then several years later thanked me because my conversations on the subject with them went on to help them with other patients that they had.

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[–] vaionko@sopuli.xyz 10 points 1 week ago

Gender and sexuality have been a blur for a long time. It's not long ago that transgenderism was considered a sexuality

[–] AnarchistArtificer@slrpnk.net 23 points 1 week ago

Online dating as a bi woman is grim. It's annoying, because in certain contexts, I'd be up for casually fooling around with a couple, but when you think you're going on a date with a woman and then her surprise boyfriend shows up, it's gross and predatory

[–] Icytrees@sh.itjust.works 21 points 1 week ago

It really opens up the world of bored white middle class couple threesomes, though. They always pay for drinks and give fantastic Christmas gifts.

[–] Aneb@lemmy.world 7 points 1 week ago (2 children)

will you fuck me? (m25) /s

[–] faythofdragons@slrpnk.net 7 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Sure, I just need the password to your bank account to verify your identity first.

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[–] ImgurRefugee114@reddthat.com 110 points 1 week ago (9 children)

You're not a pansexual until you've fucked a cast iron skillet

[–] JoMiran@lemmy.ml 55 points 1 week ago (2 children)

TIL that I am pansexual, though I might be a bit rusty.

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[–] ShinkanTrain@lemmy.ml 36 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

You can never prove you're pansexual but your degree of confidence increases for each gender you've fucked. I think that's pretty Bayesed

[–] Revan343@lemmy.ca 12 points 1 week ago

Based Bayesian statistics jokes are the kind of shit I come to lemmy for

[–] idiomaddict@lemmy.world 18 points 1 week ago

What if I just do it to treat my anemia but don’t enjoy it 🤔

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 8 points 1 week ago (1 children)

i put a cast iron in the dishwasher what does that make me

[–] ImgurRefugee114@reddthat.com 11 points 1 week ago

A domestic abuser

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[–] Tar_alcaran@sh.itjust.works 110 points 1 week ago (2 children)

A self-own on par with loudly proclaiming women never get wet when aroused because it never happened to any women you've ever been with.

[–] Junkers_Klunker@feddit.dk 22 points 1 week ago (3 children)

Surely nobody would ever say that.

[–] Tar_alcaran@sh.itjust.works 53 points 1 week ago

True.

Well, not counting Ben Shapiro

[–] sharkfucker420@lemmy.ml 34 points 1 week ago

I have met dudes who vehemently claim the female orgasm doesn't exist because they've never witnessed it

[–] prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone 7 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

Ben Shapiro did. He said that his doctor wife told him that they don't get wet lol

One of the all time classic self-owns

[–] MotoAsh@piefed.social 11 points 1 week ago

but my wife is a doctor and she agrees because she's never been wet!

[–] reallykindasorta@slrpnk.net 86 points 1 week ago (9 children)

You’re not really bisexual unless you have sex with every woman and every man

[–] irelephant@lemmy.dbzer0.com 31 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

This is inaccurate bisexual is when you've had sex twice

[–] zer0hour@lemmy.world 19 points 1 week ago (3 children)

it's twice a year, or once every other year

[–] NotJohnSmith@feddit.uk 7 points 1 week ago

No no, I have strong evidence to suggest that's called, "marriage"

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[–] Tar_alcaran@sh.itjust.works 27 points 1 week ago (2 children)
[–] kkj@lemmy.dbzer0.com 13 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

That would require enbies too. And maybe some other sapient beings that don't share our concept of sex and/or gender.

[–] ignotum@lemmy.world 21 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Let's please just all agree that it only includes beings that pass the harkness test

[–] ShinkanTrain@lemmy.ml 9 points 1 week ago (1 children)

That's when you're attracted to J. K. Simmons

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[–] Icytrees@sh.itjust.works 11 points 1 week ago

My new years resolution is to become a better bisexual.

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[–] StarvingMartist@sh.itjust.works 70 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] Skullgrid@lemmy.world 30 points 1 week ago

I'm a dad, as far as I'm concerned anyone who hasn't reproduced sexually is asexual.

chad.jpg

[–] MystikIncarnate@lemmy.ca 45 points 1 week ago (6 children)

Straight facts:

I am a straight man. Hello everyone. I hope you're all having a wonderful day.

Also a fact, I support all peoples choices in terms of what they like and how they identify. Not sure why I would care if someone else wants to be gay, bi, trans, hereto/cis, queer, lesbian, etc. I'm not those things, I'm not sure why it would bother anyone that someone else likes things? Whatever.

Also a fact from a straight guy, aka, straight fact.

While I can recognise that some masculine figures are handsome/good looking, I do not.... And I can't stress this enough.... I do not feel any attraction to men.

They can be rather good looking, but that doesn't make me want to get them naked and fool around.

If you have excitement in your pants for someone of the same gender, well.... I have news for you.... And there's nothing wrong with that.

Be who you are. Anybody who gives a shit is probably not worth knowing.

[–] AnarchistArtificer@slrpnk.net 13 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (6 children)

A term that I find useful is "~~platonic~~ aesthetic attraction".

It's a term that I learned through the ace community when I was going through the common bisexual experience of "am I bi though, or am I just asexual?". It turned out I was bi, but I find the split model of attraction is a useful framework.

~~Platonic~~ Aesthetic attraction is when you're able to see someone and go "now that is a beautiful man", but not experience any attraction in the conventional sense of the word. I personally find it useful because even though I do experience sexual or romantic attraction to people of all genders, that doesn't mean I experience that for everyone. Sometimes a beautiful person is just a beautiful person.


Edit: got mixed up, and said "Platonic attraction" when I meant "aesthetic attraction". Thanks to @gerryflap@feddit.nl for the correction

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[–] Hudell@lemmy.dbzer0.com 6 points 1 week ago (2 children)

For me it's not even that. I have zero clue about men being good lucking or not except for those who look similar to someone that has been described to me as good lucking or not.

With women I have "some" clue in general and then there's also some women that I personally find very attractive and others don't. But even the most beautiful women don't really give me any desire to do anything sexual with them unless they (or myself) first do something to make me think of it - so I might be closer to ace than actually straight.

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[–] bdonvr@thelemmy.club 34 points 1 week ago

And then the goalposts move to "Oh you have had sex with men and women? Well you're dating a woman now so clearly it was just a phase you're not actually bi"

[–] bigboitricky@lemmy.world 33 points 1 week ago (4 children)

You will deal 10% more damage if you never sleep with anyone

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[–] sharkfucker420@lemmy.ml 19 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (3 children)

You aren't pansexual unless you have had sex with every conceivable gender

[–] RmDebArc_5@piefed.zip 25 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Could you alternatively just have sex with one pangender and one agender person? Like a sort of gender min/maxing?

[–] sharkfucker420@lemmy.ml 18 points 1 week ago (3 children)

Gender min/maxing is a new favorite term of mine. Also yes

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[–] Know_not_Scotty_does@lemmy.world 16 points 1 week ago (2 children)
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[–] UnPassive@lemmy.world 15 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Had the exact same conversation with my super Christian mom. In front of some siblings. It was amazing.

She was arguing that we need to stop normalizing LGBT stuff because anyone can swing both ways.

I told her straight people can't swing both ways, if you can then you're bisexual. She did not like this, so we all took a poll and she was the only bi person in the room.

She's less homophobic now lol

[–] lemmeLurk@lemmy.zip 10 points 1 week ago

I think that's what happens a lot of time, and why there is a tiny truth to them saying things like "pride makes the kids gay". It does not, but it might teach some bi sexuals that it's okay to be just that, and not force yourself to forget about the other half.

[–] TigerAce@lemmy.dbzer0.com 11 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

You can have sex with the same sex without being gay. Look at the porno industry for example. It's all about attraction when it comes to sexual orientation.

[–] JackbyDev@programming.dev 5 points 1 week ago

Just tell them "Oh, you think the bi means two so you have to be with two people. Common misunderstanding."

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