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Are you sure that they know what that word means? Most of the time I see the word gaslighting, they actually mean something else.
What does it mean? It's a relatively new term and I've seen it used to describe everything from accidental logical fallacies to being short-changed at the liquor store
Gaslighting is the process of making someone question their own beliefs. It's usually seen in the context of abusive relationships, but any person can gaslight any other person in whatever context (i.e., politics, etc).
No, that is exactly the over-broad, willy-nilly, tossed-around definition they were talking about. Gaslighting has a much more insidious context than simply making someone question themselves. It means doing it on purpose; intentionally lying to someone and trying to convince them that they're crazy. Like if I said I was going to the grocery and then when I came back with nothing, I insisted I never said that. Or if i borrowed $50 and when it came time to pay you back, I try to tell you I only borrowed $25. It's inherently deceptive and cruel.
It's not really beliefs in the general sense, it's making them question reality, their memory, their reasons for doing things.
Plus with the context of malicious intent and lying.
Getting a racist to question their racist beliefs isn't gaslighting, but would fit the vague definition of getting someone to question their reality, their memory, and their reason for doing things when they have fallen into racist dogma.