this post was submitted on 04 Apr 2024
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Who is Google?
Once upon a time, in the vast land of Internet, there was a magical library called Web. The library had many librarians, but a wise old owl by the name of Google was the most popular one. Everyone in the kingdom of knowledge loved him. People asked him questions, and Google gave them the answers. Life was good.
However, in the dark corners of the Internet, in the Swamps of Bottomless Greed, there lurked an evil litch queen Seo. She only wanted to watch the world burn, and so she cast an evil curse on Google. The curse of Seo made Google give completely wrong answer. As chaos, ignorance and lies spread cross the land, queen Seo laughed in her castle.
The end.
Good night, sweet dreams.
I think this lets Google off the hook. I think Google wanted to be the only librarian because Google was jealous of the other librarians, so they went to the swamp of greed and negotiated with the evil queen.
Had to leave out so much from this version. Maybe there should be a director’s cut, part 2 or something. 😁
I already have some ideas for a sequel, where an evil necromancer Meta unleashes the Cancer of Facebook on the entire Internet. Later, he assassinates a competing wizard called WhatsApp and resurrects his decaying corpse thought the use of foul magic and necromancy. Now that Meta has corrupted WhatsApp, he can harness the immense power of his new minion to further increase the destruction caused by the Cancer of Facebook that is already beginning to spread across the Internet.