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Do lesbians have a concept of Top and Bottom? (lemmy.world)

submitted 3 weeks ago by stoicmaverick@lemmy.world to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml

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It's been a long ol time since I've known any lesbians well enough to ask such things, but I followed my brain down a weird line of inquiry, and got to wondering about the current state of the art for the gay gals. I guess I had always assumed it was similar to the dynamics of a gay guy relationship, but then I realized that since men have both an input and an output, they can choose, but it's mechanically a bit different for cis women. Is there any relationship between that, and the slightly more masculine versus feminine flavors? Asking for a friend, who is me. I want to know. Thanks.

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[–] Vibi@lemmy.blahaj.zone 12 points 3 weeks ago (9 children)

You'll find that in queer culture, there's not just top/bottom but a wide spectrum to define or describe preferences; I'm sure this all also applies to the BDSM world as well. There's a variety of tops and bottoms and preferences like Bambi lesbians who don't want sexual dynamics beyond cuddling and kissing.

[–] stoicmaverick@lemmy.world 5 points 3 weeks ago (8 children)

Ya, but why is everyone jumping to BDSM? That's not what I asked. I've never heard the term before, but I feel like "Bambi lesbian" is kinda reinventing the wheel for the sake of a cute name. Isn't that just a romantic asexual with a gay modifier?

[–] Repelle@lemmy.world 3 points 3 weeks ago

Bambi is an old term, older than me. It predates descriptions like homoromantic asexual, so not reinventing the wheel at all

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