this post was submitted on 28 Aug 2026
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Meanwhile, when it comes down to deciding between 20% and 100% evil: "they're both just as bad! Don't even bother deciding between the two!"
"What do you mean you don't like eating shit? My shit has got sprinkles and syrup on it. It's not as bad as that guys shit. His is runny but doesn't have sprinkles. Don't you like sprinkles?!"
No?
"Dude, your let's been completely severed. I think we need to cauterize it or something."
"What? You don't know what you're doing!"
"Its that or we rub some dirt in it and you 'walk it off like a man' or something"
"Well if we do the second one, I'll either bleed out anyway or die of infection. But burning my leg is going to cause a whole bunch of damage, and I still might get an infection. So, neither. I'm not picking either. It's fix my leg or nothing for me."