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Wife is constantly negative (alien.top)

submitted 1 year ago by BigBadIrishSir@alien.top to c/entrepreneur@indiehackers.space

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So like the title says, I have creative ideas and always try to include my wife in discussions, but all she ever brings to the table is problems and negativity when we discuss things. She thinks she's being "pragmatic" but it's tremendously disheartening and the problems she imagines are always the absolute worst of the worst case scenarios. Everything I've ever read or watched when it comes to starting businesses is, just start and figure out the problems later. I'm well aware of the potential for difficulties in any endeavor, but tend to believe in myself and my ability to adapt and overcome. Has anyone else experienced this? How did you find middle ground, if at all?

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[–] SmellyAlpaca@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago

My husband is like this, but mostly on home renovation projects. Really does burst my bubble so I do understand where you’re coming from.

But it is his way of being helpful; he’s an engineer and that’s just how he thinks. He wants every edge case accounted for. I’m the one that charges forth and figures things out as I go, because my eyes glaze over from pure boredom if I don’t.

There is a window of time where I am open to critique and want to integrate it. The rest of the time, I’m already working on my plans and it’s too late to make changes. Are you asking her for advice? If not, you can also say that you’re not looking for advice, but to vent. If she’s just giving her opinion at random times, I think you need to communicate to her it’s not helpful at certain times.

The second thing is — do you have your finances in order? Does she feel safe with you taking entrepreneurial risks? Do you have a timeline for when you see need to see profits versus when to call it quits and get a job? Do you have savings? And how long of a runway? I can’t tell if this is just a communication thing or whether she’s worried about going broke.