this post was submitted on 11 Dec 2023
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A little correction: while some of pedo instances are full of potential child abusers, others are based on non-offending (i.e. stop fucking children ffs) principles.
The latter are actually extremely important since they provide a gateway for otherwise potentially dangeous individuals to gain support and find professional help. Trying to instead blindly seed hatred towards people with any immutable traits is never productive, be it any mental disorder, sexuality, or otherwise, same as race and gender. In this case, it only prevents pedophiles from seeking help, making them more likely to become the child predator type and actually pose danger to kids.
Being a pedophile is not a choice. Being a Nazi or a child abuser are, and those should fuck themselves (but also reconsider what they do and what they believe in).
I'll play the devil's advocate here. Not supporting or opposing your point of view. Just to add to the discussion. Let's use another extreme: People with a killing spree sexual attraction. I know, I know, it may be not the same, and it's something that doesn't exist (God I hope!) But for the sake of the argument, let's assume it does.
You have this forum of people posting memes about mass killings and frustrations about not being able to kill, but that you would totally never ever kill anyone, even though the urge is there.
What would you think of such community? Would it be a safe one?
(Dear CIA, NSA, FBI agents, the above is just a completely hypothetical scenario. I am a law-abiding citizen. Always have, always will.)
I'd argue it's way better to give them a platform to vent, so instead of going to the street and killing everyone they post memes and share therapists.
Would I be grossed out? Hell yeah, just like with pedophilia. Would I still think it's a good thing? Absolutely.
It's easy to go with your gut feeling and think you're righteous to follow it. It's always harder to think it through and do and support what's actually right.
...there is a joke here that I could make about incel forums. I'm not going to try to because it's in poor taste, but my point is that I'm pretty sure that does exist....
Also, what's your actual position if that's your devil's advocate position? I'm a bit unsure if the implication there is intentional or not
Well, I don't really have a position. I think pedophilia is heinous, but I understand that sexual attraction is not a choice. Would an internet forum be a good and healthy supporting tool for pedophiles making an effort to do the right thing? That's the question I'm trying to answer.
Here's something I found on the issue:
https://www.nomos-elibrary.de/10.5771/9783748904403-279.pdf
TL;DR it very much depends on the nature of the platform, but peer support platforms like Virtuous Pedophiles seem to be more good than bad, helping in combating child sexual abuse.
Being a pedo may not be a choice, but acting on it definitely is. And any pedo who has to go searching for pedo friendly communities is not looking for help, theyre looking to get off.
Its not a big secret to them that they have something wrong to live with. They dont need a support community to tell them how not to fuck kids. It shouldnt take that much self control for them to not fuck kids...
I'd even bet the vast majority of them already do just fine living normal lives. Just like the vast majority of "normal" adults dont go around raping each other just because they feel sexually aroused by someone.
How do you jump from "searching for pedo friendly communities" to "looking to get off"?
Imagine being a gay in a country where you'll be in real danger if you'll ever mention it. Would you like to have someone at least online to talk about how you feel? Probably yes. Same idea. It's hard to hold up things that big throughout life, as just about any closeted LGBT+ person will tell you.
And then with any attraction that is actually dangerous and also illegal when acted on, like, well, pedophilia, or zoophilia, or biastophilia, or God knows what, there will always be people in doubt on whether they should go for it or not. And a community of people with the same issue telling them "we know how you feel, but CERTAINLY NO" would be way more productive than randoms on the Internet shaming them and putting them into the same bin as actual rapists.
Of course, most of them will probably never offend regardless. But people in doubt, as well as people in mental distress, are to always keep in mind. And if you ignore them, you get more child abuse, more suicides, and more pain and suffering in the world.
Maybe im wrong and they need support. Maybe im not. I certainly am in no position to say one way or another with authority. But i'd rather be wrong about keeping them shamed than be wrong about letting them feel positive about their issue.
Either way, i respectfully am done discussing the topic for now. I will give your opinions some thought though.