this post was submitted on 10 Apr 2024
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People are saying get hobbies... And yep.
I've been very "successful" on the dating apps, but they almost always resulted in a one night stand or a fling for a few weeks. You meet someone with the expectation of romance and you never form a friendship because you see eachother as romantic partners first. That may work for some people, but I see it as a loss of foundation. When I don't have a history with someone before being intimate, I tend to feel overwhelmed with the anxiety of expectations.
For me I found swing dancing was a great way to meet people. It's fun, there isn't necessarily an expectation of romance, but it also is a mood where romance can happen. I also thought to myself "I can either sit on my couch high AF while feeling like shit as I swipe left and right while trying to hold a virtual conversation that mostly goes nowhere, or I can go dancing. If I strike out on tinder, I feel like I wasted an evening. If I strike out dancing, fuck it I had a great time anyway!"