Selfhosted
A place to share alternatives to popular online services that can be self-hosted without giving up privacy or locking you into a service you don't control.
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Jitsi Meet can be self-hosted. The data will go through your server, but end-to-end encryption can be used.
Another option is Wirow. Again, data goes through the servers.
I do not think if there are any peer-to-peer video chat applications. If there were, why would there be a need for self-hosting a server?
Jitsi Meet it's usually p2p for calls between two persons. As soon as a third person joins, the meeting gets routed through the server. You can see this by a slight delay happening when person 3 joins. It won't happen again for every additional person joining
The self hosted part would be for discovery.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tox_%28protocol%29
Also when you use Jingles on XMPP, usually the voice and video part is P2P. Negociation goes through the federated xmpp servers of the respective users.