this post was submitted on 05 Sep 2024
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A little late-80s perspective: when I was growing up, "gay" was an insult we'd call eachother jokingly. Nobody "was gay" because that's a (light, funny) slur. Hell, it wasn't till I was 28 I realized it didn't "have a dating-girls phase" that I never grew out of, I was just bi.
The homophobia is still pretty deeply ingrained even in people who aren't that old and are really trying. I can only imagine how bad it is for those who aren't and don't.
I still have a hard time digesting "gay" as a slur. We simply didn't use it that way, ever. F@g could go both ways and my gay friends happily slung it at each other. An attempt to take the word back from the haters I guess. At least that word was sometimes used as a real insult.