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So here’s the deal. Good boundaries around serving others versus serving yourself and how much effort to please people and all that, is something your brain can figure out instinctively once it’s healthy.
So your path to developing those boundaries, IMO, should be something like:
Just like people pleasing feels safe and natural to you now, after you heal your trauma (which IS possible), holding your own boundaries will feel safe and natural in the same way.
You can spend your whole life coarsely emulating someone with healthy boundaries, or you can heal your trauma and fully embody those healthy boundaries from within.
Either of those paths is better than just continuing to be a people pleaser, but the latter path is the far better of the two, and takes less effort over the long run.