this post was submitted on 13 Oct 2024
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Whew, the artificial samesexness is dripping on this one.
That being said, there is something pretty awesome about discovering your body like that.
You're doing puberty, or it's doing you, and you're in this toxic relationship with it. And then you discover something like lifting that puts you into connection with it, and your whole way of looking at the world changes.
When I started lifting big, it was a weird experience. I was never small, my family runs to big hairy dudes. But I wasn't big, just big. Broad shoulders, broad hands, and potential. My family on my dad's side also puts on muscle easy. So, when I started lifting at 16, it was like fucking magic. All that testosterone finally given something to do other than cause pimples and boners.
You go from this awkward, ill fitting body into mass. It changes the way you think about yourself, and that changes how you think about the world. It can be a negative thing, and I certainly had some phases where it was. But it's a net positive most of the time.
And I definitely ran into the difference between being a slightly pudgy and non muscular doofus and being a decidedly muscular, but slightly pudgy doofus. Again, positives and negatives, but you definitely get more attention from girls/women. Sometimes not good attention tbh.