this post was submitted on 04 Dec 2024
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[–] 3aqn5k6ryk@lemmy.world 112 points 3 weeks ago (3 children)
[–] JasonDJ@lemmy.zip 53 points 3 weeks ago (3 children)

Eh, they are a less inhibited form of adults, and a product of their upbringing.

They sense and exploit weakness for personal gain. Plenty of adults do that too. That's where they learn it from.

[–] bitchkat@lemmy.world 33 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Kinda crazy to think that adults learn that behavior from kids.

[–] JasonDJ@lemmy.zip 7 points 3 weeks ago

You....you...I like you.

It does seem that way sometimes, doesn't it?

[–] sugar_in_your_tea@sh.itjust.works 7 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Yup, and I try very hard to bully my kids whenever they're bullying others so they get a taste of their own medicine, and reward them when they're excellent to others for the same reason.

My kid was a selfish brat for a bit, so I completely removed all of my attention for a bit, and I told them exactly why I was doing it. They stewed for a bit, then eventually apologized and I showered them with tons of attention.

Hopefully my kids don't end up being little terrorists, but if they do, it wasn't for lack of trying to instill some sense of humanity in them.

[–] candybrie@lemmy.world 5 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Aren't you teaching them how effective bullying is? And that it's ok for an adult to use it to get the behavior they want? Or do you face any consequences for your bullying?

I'm being pretty loose with terminology here. I don't call them names or anything, but I make sure punishments are directly related to how they mistreat others.

For example, if my kid is bullying others at the park, I remove them from the park until they're ready to apologize or it's time to go home, and I don't mind embarrassing them in front of their friends. Playing at the park is a privilege, and I'm happy to revoke that. That said, sometimes my SO will go overboard on punishments, and I'll step in to protect them if that happens (and they do the same for me). If they are misusing something to bully others (e.g. their bike), I'll take it away until they apologize.

There's always a discussion about why the behavior wasn't acceptable, how they can make it right, and what the consequences are. And every time we make it clear that we love them, it's just that specific behavior that's the issue.

It has worked pretty well so far.

[–] SaharaMaleikuhm@feddit.org 2 points 3 weeks ago

Terrible people whom I do not wish to share a planet with.

[–] tetris11@lemmy.ml 25 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (2 children)

Kids are Reddit. If they sense weakness; the others will pile on.

One shining star will talk about the injustice of it all in the aftermath, and everyone will privately forgive themselves and conveniently forget until the next time it happens.

The solution is to be arrogant. Insist your position in their society and force your presence. If you show you have self worth, others will be forced to grudgingly acknowledge it

[–] teslasaur@lemmy.world 14 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

Kids are Reddit. If they sense weakness; the others will pile on.

I'm all for a little reddit-bashing but fucking lmao. Did they bully you on askreddit or something?

[–] tetris11@lemmy.ml 3 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

I think it was more that people were prone to ask rhetorical questions in guise of actual discussion

[–] sugar_in_your_tea@sh.itjust.works 9 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (1 children)

Kids are Reddit. If they sense weakness; the others will pile on.

The same happens here. Just try to say anything remotely positive about Twitter/X, Elon Musk, or conservatives in general. I don't even like any of those, but sometimes I call out hypocrisy and get absolutely dumped on (even got a couple death threats). The problem isn't with Reddit, it's with social media in general, it really brings the worst kinds of people together.

People suck. Try to be just a little better than the person next to you and we'll all hopefully get through this.

[–] tetris11@lemmy.ml 6 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

You're right. I'd argue that lemmy has the advantage of not being so popular, and that the mindset is by default more counter-culture than status-quo (otherwise we'd still be on the major sites), so I do think that the people here tend to pile on less.... though I do admit that there are plenty of pylons here