this post was submitted on 15 Jul 2023
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How do you remain on track with toddlers onboard? (programming.dev)
submitted 1 year ago by prwnr@programming.dev to c/experienced_devs@programming.dev
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I have been working in the industry for 8 years and am now considered a senior developer, also as a team lead.

Three years ago, my first child was born, and a few months ago, a second one arrived. While I don't regret my decision to have kids at all, I do feel bad about how the lack of free time affects my career and how my knowledge falls behind the industry.

Before having kids, I used to spend a few hours a week on never-ending personal projects to learn new things. However, now I neither have the time nor the energy for that.

The only way that has worked for me is to read some tech books, which are often not about coding, and to read some blogs or subs like this.

However, I feel like this approach is too passive and is not providing the best outcome that I would expect.

Any tips there, perhaps from someone who was is similar situation?

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[–] cliffhanger407@programming.dev 3 points 1 year ago

Absolutely. Something that has somehow gotten lost in all the SE grind and staying ahead of the curve is the idea that it is our job's responsibility to us to help us grow and develop in ways that are useful to the job. We have significant informal education just from tinkering / doing personal projects when we had the time that (my hypothesis) we keep that expectation of ourselves as we enter the workplace. We wrongly believe that it is our responsibility to on our own time learn new things about technology.

When you're 12, 18, whatever, you're learning technology because you want to. You're curious and you branch out into other areas. Maintaining that curiosity in the workplace is excellent. AND, remember that a job is something that takes your labor and turns it into capital. The responsibility of a good organization is to understand what skills it needs (whether because we notice that something is missing / lacking, or because there's competent leadership), and then to prioritize its use of our time to grow those capabilities. My company gets my 40 hours. They pay me well for it. Unless there's truly an emergency, they don't get another minute of my time. They have determined that they make a profit off my salary at the level of work that I provide because we agreed to it.

If a company doesn't understand that they need to pay me to learn something that they want me to learn, then they are going back on that agreement.

Technology is both my job and my passion. I will spend all weekend messing with things in my home lab if that's what I want to do, and it often is. Other times I want to disappear into the woods and stare at trees all weekend. Prioritizing your family's needs and your needs should always come before your employer's needs.