Fediverse

The fediverse is somewhat inherently a low-trust environment. Centralized social media (including traditional web forums) has only one database of users, so its administrators are able to keep track of similarities (in geolocation, email addresses, style even of deleted posts, etc.). Here every instance has its own database of users; if you register on another instance, it will be very difficult for anyone to figure out you're the same person.

The fediverse is also still obscure enough that mostly it's still a relatively high-quality place and this has mostly not been a real problem. You should join an instance, and communities, that moderate to give you an enjoyable experience. What that means varies according to person; I don't mind the things you list very much, but am very glad I have not gotten any messages from fediverse chick Nicole in a while by now.