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Is 16 and 19 really that bad? (lemmings.world)

submitted 1 day ago by blackwitch@lemmings.world to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml

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So, my good friend (18m) had a falling out with his ex (19m) because the ex bullied him and also because he is apparently dating a 16f, so my friend thinks he is a pedophile for obvious reasons (adult + minor).

I can see why this would be considered bad but also, when I turn 16, my girlfriend will be 19 too, as I am currently a young sophomore who is about 3 years younger than her girlfriend, a senior.

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[–] RBWells@lemmy.world 8 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

I can't say a believe in rules like the half your age plus 7 thing but barely adult and barely minor is not pedophilia, particularly if you were together before aging up to adult, but even if not. The line at 18 is arbitrary, some places that's 16, and I don't think 18 is adult like a grownup, that seems to take a few more years. There are also usually laws that say it's not illegal if you are within some number of years, not a big gap.

That adult/minor split happened to my kid, they were a senior and girlfriend a junior so after graduation we tease them about "dating a high schooler" but they are the same couple as before.

A 3 year gap will just seem smaller and smaller (in that way the half plus 7 thing is true, it's just stupid as a hard rule). I'm old and 5 years in either direction is about as far as I like to go, because I like guys my age, and that's what seems "my age" now.