this post was submitted on 09 Dec 2025
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I had a similar conversation with my wife about table cloth length.
She just kept pushing it: "what do you think about a table cloth that's longer?" "What if it was shorter?" "What if it was longer one direction than another direction?"
My love, I don't think about table cloths. No part of my brain is equipped to evaluate hypothetical cloths in a way that would be realistically beneficial to the conversation.
I literally do think about table cloths and the hypothetical details surrounding them. After actually testing and researching the topic I've come to the conclusion that, unless you're hiding things under the table, the best option for use and aesthetic is the one labeled for your table size.
If you go too big, you have to balance the hang or clip it because rubbing against it when you sit will cause it to drag, the cat will pull on it, it bunches weirdly, that'd all too much. Just allow for a 6-9cm overhang on all sides, literally what the properly sized cloth will do. Have her measure the table and get that size.
I think it's great to have at least one person thinking about these things.
I can't deny that her urge to decorate does make the house look better. It makes me happy.
I just don't think she can comprehend the absolute vacuum in my brain where "home anesthetics" should be.
Reminds me of the Louis c.k. rug thing. He's sucks but the bit fits and is funny.