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I'll assume you mean antidepressants when you say "psych med journey".
I've been on many different medications over the years, and I've come to realize that these medications do not actually normalize you. They only shift the window. They do not suddenly make you feel better. They make the highs marginally higher and slightly more frequent while making the lows moderately less worse and significantly less frequent.
If you find that you are unhappy less often then they are working as intended. Whether you are happy more frequently is only a cherry on top. With that said, you should talk to your psychiatrist or psychologist if you still have concerns. These are good questions to have and you should share them with your doctor.
Antidepressants are one that I've tried, but I've been in different classes now.
I don't need something to "make me happy". I'm pretty good at that when I'm not having a rough go!
When I'm having a rough go, it feels so incredibly intense and painful, like someone is boring a hole through my body with a hot iron. I want it to help with these lows because it feels so incredibly intense and painful. When I am having a hard time, I'll either physically have a hard time walking or I'll do the opposite where I'm amped and trying not to jump into traffic.
I just want the intensity to be lowered a bit. It hasn't been.
Where my mind has been at in all of this is that most psych meds seem to be little more than placebo. That is...UNLESS you have a severe "derangement" in brain function as with something like schizophrenia or bipolar 1, where very high doses of psychiatric medication are needed to have a strong effect.
But for the population outside of these said conditions, I just am not "getting it".
If your medication is not helping with the lows then you are not responding to that medication. You are NOT doing better. Sometimes finding the right medication is a years long journey, and sometimes what you think is the problem isn't the problem at all - it is a symptom, not the cause.
I'll reinforce my previous statements. Continue talking to your doctor and let them know that your medication is NOT working.
I pray that you find the medication that works for you sooner rather than later.
Thank you, friend. All the back and forth, med changing, etc. has been pretty exhausting this past year. I get frustrated for a bit and then I try again. Hoping they get the GeneSight test to me soon so I can take it, even though it is of dubious utility.