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Realtek NICs are known to be kinda incompatible with PFSense (some features won't work). But supposedly they work just fine with OPNSense. Maybe the NIC is just faulty? I haven't personally used OPNSense, so I can't really say for sure.
But if your friend wants to run PFSense, he needs an Intel NIC, period. I'd argue that most people probably don't need 4 ports, they just need to add a decent 2.5G switch if they want more ports. But your friend might know better if he has a specific use case that requires a 4 port NIC.
Realtek are a problem with FreeBSD in general, so Opnsense has issues with them as well.
If you're using any FreeBSD-based OS you should manually compile the realtek-re-kmod port. Make sure your kernel source is in sync with what you're running.
On a router, I'd rather spend $40 on a NIC that doesn't pile up every kernel update. In the early days of Linux, I'd always keep a NE2000 in servers as a backdoor network connection for any system that had a compiled driver for a faster card.
Yeah it's a pain in the arse. I 100% recommend Broadcom or Intel NICs for a router. I have a fileserver which has several Intel NICs and a single Realtek one and the latter is a PITA.