Mental Health

I have bipolar disorder and I had taken medication for years. I stopped a couple months ago due to side effects but I know that eventually I will need them again. I am “enjoying” the break though. Good and bad emotions hit harder now but my sex drive is coming back and my emotions towards other are coming back. I was a bit emotionless on the medicine.

But like I said, I am bipolar 1. I will eventually need the meds again. It’s a medical fact that I will experience these highs and lows due to my brain structure. I have been so manic before I literally saw stars. I have been so depressed that I was ready to off myself. I used to have horrible night episodes as an adult that went away after I was medicated. They haven’t come back yet even though I am not any longer medicated.

Fortunately, I have familial support who will let me know when I need to medicate again and a strong moral sense that I never deviate from. Medicine is needed for bipolar people. Some of us can function for a time without it but it really is just a matter of time before we need it again. It’s up to the severity of the current cycle.

If hard to be mentally healthy in todays world full of despair and news constantly bashing you with negatives, some people need medicine to regulate those chemicals.

Not everyone needs medicine but becareful about search bias as you will find someone with terrible advice that has the answer you were already looking for.

I'd tried 3 or 4 SSRIs in the past and quit them for various reasons, mostly side effects. This year my psych prescribed me cymbalta and it made a huge positive difference for me. All those calming exercises people tell you to do to calm down and stop spiraling actually started working. I started being able to more easily differentiate catastrophizing from reasonable concerns. I started being able to make actionable plans to address my anxieties instead of doom spiraling for hours in paralysis. I started being able to try new things and do difficult things that intimidated me because I wasn't frozen by the anxiety anymore.

After a few months my therapist was telling me that I had done so much work to improve; at first I didn't feel that was true and that it was mostly the medication that made a difference, until she pointed out that it was the medication that enabled ME to do all the mental/emotional work to deal with my symptoms. It felt easier to do once I was on medication, so I assumed that meant I wasn't doing anything (or at least that I was slacking). But it was actually that the meds just made managing my emotions and triggers a reasonable task instead of an overwhelming one.

I have PTSD, so my nervous system is constantly on high alert without pharmaceutical intervention. After moving out of the abusive situation I grew up in, I had all the support in the world for over a decade and I was still severely struggling . Sometimes some people just need the medication to course correct their brain.

If someone doesn't want to be on medication that's their right, people have the right to not take any medication they don't want to take and it shouldn't affect the quality of care they have access to. But for me medication was a life changer and I wouldn't go off it if I could avoid it.