England had to utilize military force to control India to get the spices, to make the blandest food on the planet.
this post was submitted on 25 Jan 2026
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I'm italian, but I'm pretty sure you wouldn't want me in your kitchen
British food is great. Chicken tikka, pizza, Chinese, lasagne... The list goes on.
The best chefs in the world are men.
Nah, they've just got better publicity. Gordon Ramsey couldn't whip up a dish half as delicious as my nonna could.
I have several thousands of millions of food intolerances, so I love that British simplicity
Curry is the greatest dish of English cuisine.
The best German dishes are Döner, Spaghetti and Lasagne.
Fuckin schnitzel doesn't matter or anything!?
Nah, Germany has the best sausage.
France favorite dish is couscous
British food is actually top tier. The big difference with something like Italian food for example is Italian is quicker and easier to make, so your average person can put together a pasta dish pretty quickly as a weekday evening meal. Whereas youre not going to come home and quickly make a roast dinner or a beef wellington or a proper steak and ale pie, so instead you'll just bang some fish fingers and chips in the oven and 20 minutes later have some perfectly good scran for while you watch EastEnders.
British food is actually top tier
Stopped reading. Actually, gonna block you right after writing this message. I don't want to know anything from you ever again lmfao.
As a British person myself, I completely disagree that our food is anything you would call top tier.
We have some nice food (as you mentioned) but it's the exception, rather than the rule.
As a child I was forced to eat a lot of Sunday roasts at the grandparents that were bland and anemic and mushy, with veg boiled within an inch of its life, and where the meat was the only good part. I don't think my experience was atypical.
British food these days is getting better all the time, but mostly because modern British food is a cultural fusion of tastes and techniques from everywhere in the world, and thanks to the Internet people are actually learning how to cook. Good roasts these days have sweetly caramelised oven-roast veg with olive oil and herbs and seasonings, and are a million miles from the mush I was served as a child.
But has British food historically been good? No, it has not.
As a child I was forced to eat a lot of Sunday roasts at the grandparents that were bland and anemic and mushy, with veg boiled within an inch of its life, and where the meat was the only good part
And I used to date an Indian lass who was the worst cook I've ever met in my life, the food she made was truly disgusting. But that doesn't mean all Indian food is bad.
I know self-flagelation is a time honoured tradition of hours, but the whole "Britain bad" circlejerk is just getting annoying now.
Sure, there are always exceptions.
I'm not being self-deprecating for the sake of it - I'm speaking what I feel from personal experience. And on the basis of that experience I would rank the average state of British food well below the average state of food in a pretty wide spread of other places.
And that's what I'm basing it on - averages, not exceptions.
This affirms my hypothesis that the problem with British food is that they still have their nobility. France is the textbook example of the process - after they guillotined their nobles the good chefs that once served the elite had to offer their services to the general populace. But Britain? Only the nobles (or otherwise wealthy people) can have their servants at home prepare "a roast dinner or a beef wellington or a proper steak and ale pie", while the comments have to settle for "some fish fingers and chips in the oven".
"Everybody get the fuck out of my way and don't touch anything"
-Me, in the kitchen
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