GasMaskedLunatic

The solution is simple then. Allow businesses to maintain a phone number for people who watch ads on TV. Not like businesses getting spam calls is that big an issue. Though I'm certain they'd be very enthusiastic to have the unique contact QR feature available for tracking in web ads.

Phone numbers need to be memorable. A disposable unique contact does not. You can print a QR code, easily save it to a device, transmit it via nearly anything with a connectible screen. Of course you would want to launch it with alongside phone numbers, not in place of it, but this is what should be the next 'innovation' in cellular communication.
That said, it does pose the problem of contacting someone with a phone that isn't your own, perhaps from jail. I'm sure they would never suggest putting an emergency contact chip in your hand for your own health and safety. No government would ever suggest something so silly. /s

Agreed.

Your device and account credentials are unique enough to identify you on the carrier-level, SIM/eSIM as well. Ultimately, every time you share your contact info, it should be a unique code (QR would be convenient enough) generated by your cell provider. If it's ever leaked, you just notify your carrier to burn it, and give the contact a new unique code. No two people should be given the same contact, and all of the contacts are simply correlated to your device by the carrier. Additionally, when sharing contacts via QR, they could be modified on the device-level to include e2e encryption keys, thus further securing the transmitted information, not at the trust-me-bro carrier level, but at the user-verifiable device level. If the carrier gets hacked, reset the identifiers, associate the new one in your text app to keep conversations going, and move on like nothing happened. You'll still be better off than if your phone number was leaked. It's not perfect, but it'd be a hell of a lot more secure than what we have now.

In other words: What if a billion dollar company made Signal, but with cell towers, and not as good?

Slightly better than Vegas. Unfortunately, plenty of people are okay with Vegas odds.

This is a good idea, but will certainly be enshittification given its innovators. I'd love an AI host to introduce a song every fifteen minutes or so when I'm listening through Jellyfin where it wouldn't include ads. Given YouTube's history with ads, that's probably all the AI host will be.
random celebrity voice And now, for the best tune you've heard all day, brought to you by Ozempic. Feeling fat? I saw you delete that selfie. Talk to your doctor about getting thin- I mean Ozempic today!
cue Fat by Weird Al

It was more so a statement of my disbelief in his ability to do so. I'm happy you're satisfied with who you are. Unfortunately, that's not everyone's reality. Honestly, I probably wouldn't take it either until it's been thoroughly tested, same as everything else I do or don't take, but if I could tell with certainty it was safe, I'd try it in a heartbeat. Maybe next century we'll know for sure, but I'm highly doubtful that drug has literally any potential at all.

This is a very niche meme. I love it.

Literally nothing. It will be applied more nefariously after it's been proven capable.

Good. Anyone with ties to Peter Thiel should be investigated thoroughly.

Well, if Lord Robert McCauley says it, it must be true. I am truly humbled by your superior intellect and ability to determine a currency from a Ponzi scheme by citing essays that have nothing to do with Monero. Goodbye.