"Scaring the hoes" is a catch all term for when the things men enjoy in private or with other men create environments that are inhospitable to women.
I've always heard it in a comedic context, said with nearly the same tone as when Eustace berates Courage the Cowardly Dog.
Depends on your use case. If you like the content or communities that exist here, then obviously stay. Lemmy/Kbin/Mbin feel fairly stable about what communities exist and which get actual traffic, so make your decision based on your interests and interactions, as well your beliefs.
I'm on Reddit way more often than I'm on here cause my favorite subreddits don't exist here in any capacity oe have minimal activity