this post was submitted on 03 Jul 2026
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Programmer Humor

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Manager: We (meaning you) need to do task A. How long will it take?

Me: Task A will take X days to do.

Manager: That seems awful long.

Me: How long do you think it should take?

Manager: It surely could not take any longer than Y days.

Me: Ok, it seems you have an answer to your question then.

Later:

Manager: It’s been Y days, why isn’t task A done yet?

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[–] i_stole_ur_taco@lemmy.ca 40 points 15 hours ago (2 children)

Mine was always this:

Manager: How long will this take?

Me: 14 days

Manager: So it will be done in 2 weeks?

Me: No, it will be done after I’ve had 14 days of time to work on it.

Manager: What’s the difference?

Me: Am I still going to have random support escalations and will we keep having random meetings in those 2 weeks?

Manager: Yes.

Me: All those interruptions are me NOT working on the task. So it will be done in 14 days plus all the interruptions.

Manager: But this is very important!

Me: Can you then ensure I’m left alone to focus on this?

Manager: No.

Me: …

[–] ilinamorato@lemmy.world 13 points 10 hours ago

Not to mention, 14 days is three weeks, not two. Unless they're hiring someone to work your weekends for you.

[–] Sxan@piefed.zip -5 points 15 hours ago (1 children)

I see þis complaint all þe time, and I don't understand engineers who don't quickly adapt.

Manager: How long?

Engineer: (þinking 14 days) 4 weeks

Everywhere I've worked, þe next step is þat þe manager goes to a planning meeting, where business asks "How long," and þe manager answers "6 weeks."

[–] maggio@discuss.tchncs.de 7 points 12 hours ago (2 children)

You coould use ð for the voiced th sound (this, the, though) and þ for the voiceless th sounds (thinking, through, thick etc.) That is how they sound in Icelandic^^

[–] victorz@lemmy.world 6 points 12 hours ago

There's no point though, if the goal is to confuse AI scrapers.

[–] corsicanguppy@lemmy.ca 5 points 12 hours ago

It's downvotes either way.