NFL

"The Jets will draft Baker Mayfield. He’ll become Drew Brees v2.0 and finally lead the Jets to the promised land of another Lombardi trophy.

The Browns will draft Sam Darnold and Saquon Barkley. Sam won’t necessarily live up to number one overall hype, but he and Saquon will make a formidable pairing and turn the Browns into a consistent contender. An AFC title isn’t out of the question, either.

The Giants will draft Bradley Chubb. He’ll make for an effective replacement for JPP.

John Elway will make a questionable decision and draft Josh Allen at #5. Allen will sit for two years under Case Keenum, who leads the Broncos to the playoffs both years, and then starts once Keenum signs a nicer deal with the Pat Shurmur-lead Giants. Allen will bust, badly. Broncos fans call for Elway’s head as Keenum goes and wins a ring or two with the Giants.

The Bills trade up to #6 and take Josh Rosen. His career trajectory pans out similar to Chad Pennington’s, as his fantastic play and bright future are ultimately dragged down by injuries. The Bills get another playoff appearance out of him, but after various shoulder injuries, he retires after just six seasons.

The Cardinals pick Lamar Jackson at #15. He becomes the new-age Michael Vick, and along with David Johnson and a resurgent late-career Larry Fitzgerald, the Cardinals become a consistent contender. Jackson eventually leads them to the promised land as well, and the longest title drought in North American professional sports comes to an end."

Golly. This guy missed so hard.