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My family is very similar. We aren't quite paycheck to paycheck, but things feel a lot tighter than they did before - we make 190 ish combined, which ends up being about 9k a month. We have one paid off car.
Mortgage - $2500 Utilities - $800 (electric, water, plain Internet and mnvo cell phone plan) Daughter's school - $1200/mo (obv this is a "non essential", but it's pretty cheap for a year round private school) Prescriptions - $1200/mo with insurance (although this usually comes in a single lump in January. Insurance also refuses to cover a few essentials which we pay out of pocket for, about $100/mo) Student loans - $800/mo
Which leaves us with around $2500/mo for entertainment, car/house repair (it's 40 years old and needs new things like a roof or hot water heater from time to time), groceries, any vacations, etc. My wife and I both have chronic conditions which are exhausting to deal with so we get house cleaning for $300/mo as well.
We are doing fine, but it seems like an exhausting cycle to try and build savings, and if we ever had to buy another car I don't know how we would swing an extra $500 payment every month, with what it seems vehicles cost these days.
All this to say, while we are ok, I have no idea how families making under 100k get by.
Most people are not paying $1200/month for childcare or $300/month for a maid. They also probably put a lot less toward retirement.
That said, good on you for recognizing that the average household is struggling.
Sure, for school age kids like my daughter that is true, but I will push back that toddler and infant childcare is, on average, extremely expensive.
If you don't have a grandparent or other relative to watch your kid, in a state like North Carolina you will be forking out around $800-900 a month per kid on average.
Which is why publicly funded options for preschool would be life-changing for so many people, especially single mothers and fathers.