this post was submitted on 06 Jan 2024
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More options are great I suppose, but as a gem-xer I don't get the modern revolt against the condom. Modern condoms are pretty damn thin / good and are a form of male birth control with bonus of very good disease prevention, have next to no side effects, and minimize messes too.
All true, but they also feel awful, sometimes painfully tight, and are total erection killers. I use them, but I hate using them.
It's the pause in the flow of things to go get one and put it on plus difficulty finding the right size. Used em my entire life until my wife had an IUD put in. After a few ears she had it removed and going back to condoms was not super fun for either of us.
On the bright side for me, a vasectomy solved all these issues and was totally worth the minimal process to get it. This solution sounds like a dream honestly.
Feeling awful is true (or having less feeling overall), but you can just buy a bigger size if it's too tight. The run of the mill condoms are uncomfortable for me too, look at something like https://www.my-size-condoms.com/
I can vouch for My Size. They have a sizing guide to ensure that you're picking the correct size, they fit very nicely and snuggly but aren't uncomfortable, and are vegan too. Both partners I've had/have and tried them with had no complaints whatsoever.
Additionally, these are also great if you're on the smaller side.
Needles ahoy then mate!
Well look at mister big dick over here...
Modern?
Has it increased in some way over time? I think men not wanting to wear condoms because of how they feel is a tale as old as the condom itself.
I think for those that have grown up with porn in their palms it is different yes. Admittedly that's my impression and that of my peer group. I'm not aware of data on the matter.
IMO for anyone in a stable monoamorous relationship, the IUD is the superior option, as long as the female partner is a good fit for it and doesn't have complications from it.
My wife had significant issues with hers, including basically never-ending spotting and occasional surprise periods, cramps, mood issues, etc. She had it removed after 2 years.
I'm thinking a vasectomy is the next thing, but it isn't covered on my insurance and finding a doctor is intimidating.
Condoms suck for everyone involved
That's an interesting generalization. I'm going to to count myself out of everyone then.
There's no harm in condom + anything else considering all the horror stories of condoms accidentally/intentionally not working.
This gives another option that sounds pretty easy and not very invasive for anyone.
There are horror stories for everything. There are also statistics. If you prefer horror stories to the latter there is nothing you shouldn't fear.