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Depending on your use of Matrix you will run into memory and disk spaces issue pretty soon. Basically if you plan to participate in large public Matrix rooms it will not work on a cheap VPS because of that. However if you mainly use it for private messaging between friends etc. it will likely work.
That said, personally I think XMPP is better for that use-case as the mobile apps are easier to use and use less battery. The easiest way to set up a personal XMPP server for friends and family is https://snikket.org
XMPP servers are super resource efficient, so even the cheapest VPS will not have any problems with it.
Just came here to say this, it workson a 10 dollar a year racknerd vps for me no problem. Matrix chugs on my much bigger vps, although it is sharing that with a bunch of other things, overall it should have mich more resources.
has xmpp figured out carbons yet between multiple clients? also are there any good mobile clients?
Yes to both. Check out https://joinjabber.org
Im looking for simmilar thing as OP, a private chat server for 3-5 users. Your post seems super usefull.
I've checked snikkets docker-compose and there are proxy and certs containers included. Can I use existing NPM reverse proxy with that docker-compose do you know? Asking before I start modifying docker-compose on my own trial and error approach
Hmm, maybe it is possible, but Snikket is quite opinionated and you need to keep in mind that the XMPP server also needs direct access to the TLS certificate as it isn't only using port 443.
Maybe it will be better to just use Prosody (or Ejabberd) instead then.
Thanks, Ill check that out