Selfhosted
A place to share alternatives to popular online services that can be self-hosted without giving up privacy or locking you into a service you don't control.
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I would like to know the problems you're having with systemd, but since you wouldn't like to explain....
TBH with all the shit I give Poettering, systemd is a good system for the most part, it's just ideologically not for me, and it's also really complicated from people who have worked on it.
With that said, I'd point you towards Alpine. I once ran a server in the cloud with it and have no issues other than if you were to use musl, but if you're using GNU I don't think you'll have such issues.
Why aren't you trying the BSDs? FreeBSD is quite stable and if you're going to run VMs anyway, run a couple to host your k8s infrastructure/podman nodes and off you go!