this post was submitted on 13 Mar 2024
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[–] dumpsterlid@lemmy.world 2 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

It makes me want to become an army recruiter for video game armies, instead of trying to sleazily recruit high school kids to go get murdered or maimed across the planet I use all the same rhetoric army recruiters use to make the the military seem cool but I recruit kids to play video games while dressed up in camo instead.

My pamphlets are of video games where you can do cool military stuff without actually killing anybody or getting hurt. Hey check out Arma 3, you can use all those cool looking jets and tanks to nerd out and blow stuff up and THEN when you are done you can just turn it off and go do something else because it’s a fantasy.

Framed on my table is a picture of Iraq after 20 years of brutal occupation and war with stats on the amount of civilians dead, infrastructure destroyed and American servicemen killed. Next to it is a framed picture of Blood Gulch after 20 years of brutal multiplayer matches with a bunch of zeros next to all the same stats.

I also have a “But I Want To Serve My Country” pamphlet which suggests types of jobs and careers that actually serve the country and local community like teacher, nurse, tradesman, social worker etc…

The poster behind my recruiting table says “Just Go Play A Video Game, Joining The Military Is Lame”.

This would be hilarious to do in character as a recruiter from Helldivers 2.