this post was submitted on 01 May 2024
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[–] Emperor@feddit.uk 14 points 6 months ago (1 children)

If you are an open-minded cis dude who respects women and sees them as equal human beings you’ll have no problem finding anyone.

It's not always that simple. For example, I cared for my Dad 24/7 which involved a convoluted pill regime (and a series of alarms throughout the day). My social life took a real hit. There are also mental and physical health issues, as well as financial aspects.

All that said, anyone thinking this is the solution deserves to be scammed because it is hardly informed consent.

[–] flora_explora@beehaw.org 6 points 6 months ago (1 children)

OK, let me rephrase this into "if you are ... you will be as likely as cishet women to find someone to date". My point was that cishet men may have it hard to find someone because they are not catching up with progressive and emancipatory values. There are many many heteropessimisstic or otherwise frustrated women out there searching for a guy that does not treat them like shit.

But sure, if you don't have the capacity for a social life or for dating then obviously this won't be as easy. My comment was a response to the premise that cishet guys have it harder in dating and that they should be allowed to scam people.

[–] Emperor@feddit.uk 3 points 6 months ago (1 children)

My point was that cishet men may have it hard to find someone because they are not catching up with progressive and emancipatory values.

It's worse than that - things seem to be regressing, with a widening political divide between men and women, especially noticeable in the younger adults.

It definitely feels like the modest progress that was made is now being eroded away

[–] flora_explora@beehaw.org 2 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (1 children)

Yeah, it's pretty disheartening and even frightening. I don't know how to educate men on feminist ideas and get them on board. And being antifeminist doesn't even benefit them that much. There are so many men living their life miserable and ending up in jail because of their toxic masculinity and societal expectations of men. And I'm certainly interested in helping cis men get better, reconnect with their emotions and learn about emancipation. But at the same time I don't see how people who are not cis men can do so much to really help them. We are pretty busy surviving them and supporting each other.

[–] Emperor@feddit.uk 2 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (1 children)

And being antifeminist doesn’t even benefit them that much.

The only people benefitting are those peddling the lies to disgruntled young men, partly as a grift and partly as misdirection from the real sources of their issues.

But at the same time I don’t see how much people who are not cis men can do so much to really help them.

And it shouldn't be your job to fix young men but I am as stumped as you and I worry about people like my nephew who is early teens.

There's !mensliberation@lemmy.ca but I don't know if that's not just preaching to the converted.

[–] flora_explora@beehaw.org 2 points 6 months ago

Yes, it is really a frustrating situation. Since you seem to be a man, maybe you can be a good example to your nephew? But well, not so easy either unfortunately :(