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I think we're going to have to agree to disagree. To use your example, if my neighbor was smoking in a place that it was stinking up my bedroom, and I asked them to stop doing it there, and they were like "nah I like it here" I'd consider them a huge asshole. Just do it over there not by my bedroom or something.
One confounding issue here is that fireworks affect a pretty big area. The whole neighborhood is probably going to hear them.
I don't know anything about you so this might not land, but I wonder if there's an urban rural divide on this. Folks that live in a more dense area might on average be more considerate of their neighbors. I've known people who live out in the woods that are big on "I do what I want on my property!" Though plenty of people everywhere are assholes, so who knows.
Telling them they can't smoke in their own home, or can't ride public transit after smoking is ridiculous.
So does the smell of weed. That was a hypothetical example as luckily my neighbors don't smoke, but my grandparents neighbors do, and it stinks up the car whenever I drive past that whole block- so it definitely is something that effects a large part of the neighborhood.
I live in a city, I had an argument with my partner last night because he was against getting a fire alarm(not mandated in our country) because it could wake up the neighbors at night. Which I believe is a totally acceptable cost, but he does not.