this post was submitted on 13 Jan 2025
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A Boring Dystopia
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awesome, that will go nicely with my 6-month financing for last week's Papa Joe's pizza
Considering i don't plan on retiring, this is fine -- i will leave as much debt as possible in my wake when i move onto the great gig in the sky ๐
Except for the fact that you'll eventually have everything you own taken away AND be put in jail.
Debtors prison called debtor's prison might be illegal, but tons of de facto debtors prisons that de jure go by other names are becoming the standard way for US local and state governments to punish people for existing while poor.
I don't have, and won't have children.
When I get into my older years, I'm just gonna grab a couple thoussnd loans, and be done with life. Fuck it. I'm gonna spend my elderly years lonely, high off my ass, and giving the middle finger to society.
I figure I'll go to base ball games, and start drinking lemonaide with tea in it. And also take some drugs.
Look man. Don't even get me started about the damn 2020 rules that have stuck around.
I don't understand why they felt the NEED to play baseball during a global health pandemic, but if we're starting out already establishing the fact that they had to play baseball in that....THEN I say the 2020 rule changes made sense. For 2020.
But now??? Fuck the pitching clock. Fuck the extra innings man on second! I do NOT want my game sped up. I do not want a faster game. I want to sit in the sun, and enjoy a slow breezy summer day, in my happy place watching baseball. Look, I'll be 85. And now you're telling me my damn baseball ticket which cost me $30,000 because of inflation by 2067, now means I only get 2 hours of baseball??? Hell, thats hardly even enough time to find my seat! You know I don't walk so fast. I don't mean because I'll be 85. I'm 41 now, and I didn't walk so fast 20 years ago.
But now you tell me, after 85 years on this planet. Living through 9/11, a global pandemic, 6 terms of a trump presidency, global warming making winter in the north 115F degrees, and after all that bullshit, you wanna make my baseball shorter??? Oooooooh, and you wonder why us old timers are cranky! Boy let me tell you when I was a young spruce, I'd have pounded 15 shots of whiskey, drank about 24 beers, and then proceeded to mop the floor with you! Well lucky for you, I've only had 10 shots of whiskey, and 15 beers, but I also took some other extra ciricular activities, and now I'm not sure if you're a person, or if I'm talking to a lamp post again!
I'm gonna be a grumpy old man, who yells at the youth for not understanding things they weren't alive to experience.
It's gonna be great!
I like the pitching clock. I don't expect to be able to afford to go to baseball games in my old age. And drugs will be sketchier because of all the other prescription medications I'll likely be on.
By next week you should be able to roll that over and get a second mortgage secured against the first pizza for a new pizza.
Pizza mortgage lmao
luckily I don't have to eat every day!
This is why I financed the whole pizza and take out pizza equity loans as I pay it off. It affords a few slices every now and then.
should have gone to Mahjong's Pizza, you would have got a lower APR
Looking for angel investors for my new business idea: if we offer the lowest pizza down-payments in town, we can edge everyone else out of the market by 2034 and be the market leader!