this post was submitted on 31 Mar 2025
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Zero. Become partially disabled for over a decade and you might understand. Sometimes surviving is worse than dying. You might become a different person you might not, but you will likely discover how everyone in your life is largely there in relative orbits. If you get knocked out of the stellar system, what you thought of as the planets that grounded your social world will not leave the star to chase after you no matter how much you need them to.
Having been through a bad health situation, I understand what you mean. Not even my own parents supported me.
That's terrible.
They are the only ones that are supposed to help you.
Also the people you consider real friends can let you down.
In my experience it's sometimes the ones you don't expect that are there for you.
You didn't ask their help and are just close enough to vent your problems.
Those are the good people and that gives me a sparkle of hope for the otherwise very grim world.
That has been my experience too. The not expected actually there for you friend. There are friends we feel close to and friends who would drop everything to come lend aid. There may be some overlap between those two groups, but don't mistake the former for the latter.
Few and far in between
I didn't expect an astrophysics analogy when I opened this post but good one
Absolutely. I’m not disabled but I can say with confidence there are genuinely zero good people on this planet. Me included. People are truly only in it for themselves and will cast aside and trample anyone who gets in their way.
Learned that first from my parents. Even if they’re related to you, they will throw you under the bus at their earliest convenience.
I know several people who would give up anything on hand to help if needed. There are plenty of good people in this world. If you're willing to give, you will find those willing to help
But there’s no guarantee that if the time came where someone was in need, they would actually act and give up things on hand.
I grew up thinking that friends and loved ones took care of each other when in need. I even dropped big things to help those I loved. My mom neglected her health until she needed an emergency surgery and once I found out I dropped a final exam in uni to make sure she got there and took her meds.
When I had a serious emergency though, I was completely alone. Both parents, all family and friends. You have friends until they decide you don’t offer them enough. It’s too much energy expended to maintain dynamics like that with multiple people. You end up feeling worthless and that takes a big toll on your health.
Some people suck. But no, that's not the case for many of the people I know. I know many people who aren't transactional at all. I have friends who don't care about value and will help whenever is needed. I know other people who are like what you're talking about. But still, the good ones, that will help for whatever, are genuinely good. They're not doing it as a transaction.