this post was submitted on 12 Apr 2025
738 points (98.7% liked)

Funny

9267 readers
1438 users here now

General rules:

Exceptions may be made at the discretion of the mods.

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
 
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] SadSadSatellite@lemmy.dbzer0.com 27 points 2 weeks ago (4 children)

In freedom units that's fast as fuck

[–] mmddmm@lemm.ee 31 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)
[–] SadSadSatellite@lemmy.dbzer0.com 11 points 2 weeks ago

Unfortunately, I don't live in the free world, I live in the "freedom" world. I have to convert km/h to as hell and km/s to as fuck.

[–] LanguageIsCool@lemmy.world 5 points 2 weeks ago

The Space World uses km/s

[–] Clent@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

They forgot the (tm), i.e.; Freedom Units(tm)

[–] anomnom@sh.itjust.works 1 points 2 weeks ago

It’s spelled Freedumb

[–] cram42@mander.xyz 1 points 2 weeks ago

PepsiCo presents Freedom Units (TM)

[–] Nurse_Robot@lemmy.world 12 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (3 children)

Actually, in Freedom Units it's 2,040,000 blue whales per hour

Length of a blue whale: 30 meters 61,200 km / 0.03 km = 2,040,000

[–] spicytuna62@lemmy.world 6 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (2 children)

Nope. You're off by a power of 10 because 30 meters is 0.03 km.

So it's 2,040,000 blue whales per hour. ;)

But in terms of miles an hour? About 38,000. Or, as the crow flies, LA to New York in 3 minutes and 51 seconds. That's less time than it takes to listen to the hit Madonna song "4 Minutes."

[–] Nurse_Robot@lemmy.world 3 points 2 weeks ago

Whoops, good catch. I definitely thought .03 and then just screwed it up anyway

[–] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 2 weeks ago

3 minutes and 51 seconds. That's less time than it takes to listen to the hit Madonna song "4 Minutes."

Unless we're talking the radio edit, of course. Otherwise, four minutes is also less time than 4 Minutes.

[–] SadSadSatellite@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I really feel like freedom units should be hotdogs per second.

It's cheating to use footlongs, btw.

Hotdogs aren't standardized though. But I guess we could agree to use Kirkland Signature hotdogs, you know, the ones Costco sells for $1.50 + soda at the food court.

[–] PattyMcB@lemmy.world 1 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

How many bald eagles, though?

[–] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Depends on your deep frying equipment.

[–] PattyMcB@lemmy.world 2 points 2 weeks ago

I hear the secret sauce on Big Macs actually contains some bald eagle (allegedly)

[–] dohpaz42@lemmy.world 8 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

If by “freedom units” you mean football fields, that would be roughly 109,361.33 ff/s.

[–] SadSadSatellite@lemmy.dbzer0.com 14 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Most Americans could probably use metric easily if they just remember a meter is about 180 5.56 NATO rounds wide. A kilometer is 111,111 9mm rounds.

Easy.

Why did you use communist units?

Use the .223 Remington round, which is the civilian version (i.e. freedom variant) of the 5.56 NATO round, and is what's generally used in the AR15.

I'll allow the 9mm because it's used by the FBI and many police departments, but a true patriot would use the .40 round, which is about the same size, just a little shorter, a little stockier, a little heavier, and a bit more gunpowder. So 98425 .40 rounds wide is one km, or round to 100k.

Use imperial rounds, not communist metric rounds.

[–] PattyMcB@lemmy.world 1 points 2 weeks ago

109,361... that's fast AF, FFS!

[–] Condiment2085@lemm.ee 1 points 2 weeks ago

How does that just happen to be your username