this post was submitted on 14 Nov 2023
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He’s also my business partner. He kept his watch collection with me since his wife doesn’t allow him to buy watches and made me promise not to ever tell his wife about them. Not only because she doesn’t like it but also because she will definitely ask him to sell them and probably spend the money on clothes and traveling like she often does.

He lets me use the watches in the condition that I don’t cause any damage. But now that he passed away it doesn’t feel right any more.

His watch collection is worth about 200K$ in todays market. I think the lawful and ethical thing to do is to break the promise and tell his wife but I’m not sure that’s the right thing to do since he made me promise not to tell her.

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[–] RuRhPdOsIrPt@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago (6 children)

Man, there are some watch zealots in here, thinking that a verbal gentleman’s agreement about a collection outweighs $200k in estate property rights. There’s nothing to think about, you have to give them to the wife, right away. Legally, morally, in terms of business-ethics and your reputation, your exposure here is massive.

I’m sorry for your loss.

[–] Amf2446@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago

I suspect something else is behind the watch zealotry, too. Probably not a coincidence we’re talking about a wife, not a husband.

[–] PrudentVermicelli69@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago

verbal gentleman’s agreement

Bros before hoes.

[–] YxngIntouso@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Legally sure, but whats your president for this being the moral decision?

[–] RuRhPdOsIrPt@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

“He kept his watch collection with me”

“He lets me use the watches”

OP doesn’t claim to own or have been given these watches. They are not his. Purchases made during a marriage are generally considered joint property, purchased with joint funds. The widow inherits the husband’s estate, including all property and applicable debt of that estate. For all we know, the watches were bought on credit, with the debt still owed by the estate.

[–] YxngIntouso@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago

Good point, if OP has been given the watches unofficially by his friend what would be the moral move now?

[–] Spicy_Wasabi6047@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago

Man its almost like this is a watch subreddit

[–] Pretend_Spray_11@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Seriously. Respectfully, even the deceased’s logic is messed up. “She would spend them on clothes and trips.” Okay? Watches are clothes, so no difference there. And she surely deserves a trip now so fuck it. Give them back.

[–] useless_kid7@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Its his stuff not his wife’s, also for many people there is a sentimental attachment to watches and having them sold off after you die would seem horrible to them

[–] skoolhouserock@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

It was his stuff, but since he died without a will that stuff belongs to his estate. If he felt sentimental enough about them and wanted to keep them from her he could have written a will that did exactly that.

[–] useless_kid7@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Yeah if you look at it from the standpoint of the law but consider your friend especially if you’re not gonna face any consequences for breaking the law. He couldn’t have written him into the will otherwise the wife would’ve seen it on the will and got upset

[–] skoolhouserock@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago

If any of my friends asked me to help hide 200k from their spouse, I wouldn't have done it. I don't have much sympathy for OP or his friend in this case (I mean about the watch thing specifically, I obviously have sympathy about the person passing away and OP grieving that loss). If his wife finds out, she should absolutely be upset about this. It's a shitty, inexcusable thing for her husband to have done.