Watches

Did he pass his share on your mutual business to his wife? If yes, I would recommend selling them and investing the money in your mutual business and the increased income from it will serve his wife better. Win win situation for me, you don't expose his secret, and also make his wife have a better income, which will make him happy up there don't you think?

Any chance he bought them in the name of the business?

It’s not your moral duty or business to decide how his wife treats the watches and if she liquidated them or not.

The most you can ask is right to buy them first (any or some or all).

Obviously you must give them in. What the actual heck.

Regardless of your ethical and moral values you have the LEGAL obligation to give those watches to his wife.

Haha, a pretty even split on telling her vs not.

I dont think i could wear one of the watches and not feel slimy. I would have to come clean to her. Who knows what she'll do - give you one? All? Some?

You help her sell the rest, or offer to?

For people in here claiming “legally” or “ethically” he gave him his collection.. it was a gift. What law requires him to give the watches to the wife? Thread of keyboard lawyers

Just tell his wife. I know your friend told you not to tell her, but it just feels wrong to hold on to his watches

Man most guys in here don't know what "promise" means.

People telling you to not tell his wife are missing the point of the secret. Now that he's dead, his/her spending habits are not relevant. She needs to have the watches and be able to sell them. It's not even close, morally.

You need to tell the wife. It's not breaking the promise at all. You kept your promise until his death.

If you keep the watches, you'd literally be stealing from his wife.

First, I’m sorry for your loss.

Second, the only good piece of advice I’ve seen in here is that you need to talk to a lawyer in your state who does this sort of estate work. There’s a moral philosophical debate to be had over whether you should tell his family or keep the secret posthumously, but that debate is secondary to the legal question of what has to be done with this, as you’ve described it, $200k asset.

I'd just keep them

If asked say he verbally gave them to you

If the value of the watches were <$5k I’d say keep the secret, but $200k is crazy and will have a positive impact on the wife’s financial situation. It does sound like the wife is already set up pretty good though, so if $200k is chump-change to her I’d keep the watches in honor of the friends secret.

If he can afford $200k in watchs then I'm sure his family should be fine. Just enjoy your memento from your friend.

Keep the watches. He trusted you.

Only you know the relationship between him and his wife. If you think he didn’t want her to have them that’s your answer.

Sorry for your loss OP. I suspect a lot of Redditors are in this same boat; I now know why people flaunt their watches on subreddits but in reality, it’s tucked in a watch case as safe queens never seeing the light of day.

In less he willed them to you, the right thing to do is give them to the widow. That’s a considerable amount of money. If this was unexpected, the family may need it.

I think that legally you have to give them back.

First and foremost: Jesus H. Christ what a bitch.

Secondly: Frankly, I would keep honoring the agreement and use the watches as the agreement still stood. Just use it without causing damage. If you tell the queen bitch (aka the wife), she'd sell everything like he 100% didn't want to happen, so it would be disrespectful of his wishes.

The fact that he does not have any kids makes me feel you should keep them.

If I was him, I would want you to keep them.

This sounds tragic, I'm sorry for your loss. Most people here are advising you to give it back, which also seems to be the legally correct way to me.

But, since it's both about a promise that is up to interpretation and about a sizable amount of money, I'd ask a lawyer.

He died intestate. I'd argue by giving you possession and control of the collection, and telling you not to tell his wife, he made a de facto gift to you. There is a case that lawfully, you are under no obligation to divest yourself of the watches, nor tell his wife. But I'd recommend consulting a wills and trusts attorney.

Ignore those on here telling you what the legal requirements are on this. They don't even know what State he died in, which is crucial to know.

Tell his wife. She'll probably cherish them. Worst case she can sell them for a nest egg.

I'd speak to a lawyer, sounds like he didn't want her to have them.

I would not give them back. He entrusted them to you. It’s just as unethical to let his wife waste away his collection in death as she would’ve in life. If you think this is a legal issue (common property), then just don’t tell her. It’s essentially a gift.

buu.. buttttt lEgAlLy

Jesus, I've never seen a bigger group panzies in my life. I thought considering the way everyone here throws a fit over differing opinions and branding that some of you would have a backbone but daaaamn, not one single person that isn't a giant vagina in this entire thread???

Man, there are some watch zealots in here, thinking that a verbal gentleman’s agreement about a collection outweighs $200k in estate property rights. There’s nothing to think about, you have to give them to the wife, right away. Legally, morally, in terms of business-ethics and your reputation, your exposure here is massive.

I’m sorry for your loss.

They are a gift to you she sound self centered

It might be ethical and lawful to do so. If you want to keep those watches yourself and keep the promise, then you shouldn't mention anything about the watches. It's totally your choice and go with what feels right for you.

You should keep one of the watches at least, that’s the bare minimum he would have wanted, if his family comes from money and he has no kids you should keep them. It’s a passion you shared and he trusted them with you. Talk to a lawyer though.

The lawful and ethical thing to do is tell his wife.

But I'd consider the timing. If she finds out about this after an unexpected loss that could either make her feel even worse that she make him live hiding things he loved/enjoyed from her. Or she might be pissed and wonder what else he hid from her. Probably some of both.

Maybe wait until she has some time to accept the loss before telling her this. Just a thought... you know her personality and can make a better decision about this. But they are hers and need to be given to her, I'd say, within 6-9 months if not right away.

How is everyone saying the ethical thing is to tell the wife? You promised your friend you wouldn’t tell her. The ethical thing is to keep the promise to your deceased friend!

Would there be any indication that he would not want the value of the watches to benefit his still living family but instead to benefit you? Nothing you have said indicates this.

The implied meaning of the promise clearly was in life unless he expressly sais otherwise. Keeping them would be highly unethical.

I personally would sell them individually and give her the cash.

What in the world......

Yeah bro don’t listen to the simps saying “the wife this the wife that” if you know her and you know she spends on stupid things hold those watches

Ethically let his wife know. Logistically don’t. He’d want you to wear them and keep his collection alive rather than someone he doesn’t know I guess

Watches belong to her wife, thats the law. Period. You can keep them but its basically theft. Not even sure why you are thinking about "breaking promise". Dude is gone, it doesnt matter now.

Those are part of his estate. The right thing to do is give them to his wife. Do that.

Just my two cents. OP's friend may have been able to conceal his watch collection from his own wife. But I doubt he will be able to hide expenses for 200K$, from whoever will take care of his finances.

sorry for your loss. definitely take some time to grieve and what not and think things through.

it's a tough spot. but when he passed away, things that were his go to his spouse or next of kin. (without a will, i believe thats the legal way). tell his wife the story and if you'd like, offer to buy any watches as a memory if she allows. also, so she doesn't get ripped off incase she doesn't know watches, tell her the prices of those watches used. funerals and suddenly being on one income can be quite a burden on someone financially especially if it's sudden.

If it was me I wouldn't tell her, a promise is a promise man

a promise is not a legal contract.

his promise is also a shitty thing, and sequestering assets from his wife is a shitty thing (for all the incel shitty mens rights nonsense... when you're married, your assets and debts are shared. his money is not his, it's "theirs") those watches are just as much hers as they were his.

regardless of his promise. the right and legal thing to do, is to contact the family, let them know that you have some of the deceased property and would like to return it.

you aren't obligated to say anything more. than... he chose to store the items with you, and you're returning them.

but you're a shitty person if you try and steal the items. they're are the "estates" and more than likely the wive's

Didn’t penthouse have stories like this? Oops, wrong sub..

I think if you knew about the watches and not his wife he trusted you in a sense more than his wife. Just sit on it for a little bit. He sounds like me no kids, but if I died I would want my best friend to have all my gold chains

Talk to a lawyer. It's a lot of money.

Keep the watches, it was your promise to him. Don’t break it.

Do you like the wife? Does she need the money? 200k is for the most people a lot of money. But with a collection like that i think he also had some more money for her. When she dont need the money and you dont like her keep the watches. When she need the money, sell them and give her the money.

Unless they were gifted to you, you do not have any claim over them. If she finds out you kept / sold his property you are looking at a lawsuit.