this post was submitted on 20 Nov 2023
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[–] Cautrica1@alien.top 1 points 11 months ago (21 children)

Never will I understand what’s so bad about living with your parents rent free and stacking money in your early 20s

[–] Fools_Requiem@alien.top 1 points 11 months ago

People seem to have an issue with his parents making his bed and doing his laundry, but that's their business. Why should anyone care if the mom wants to do things for him to make his life a little easier. It would be like complaining that Josh Dobbs' folks moved his stuff for him after he got traded to the Vikings.

I'd also like to know how different it is if a player hires a maid to do all that stuff for him outside of the fact that you're paying someone.

[–] tiggs@alien.top 1 points 11 months ago

There's nothing wrong with it in your early 20s. The only issue is when your mother continues to be "mommy" and these guys have no clue how to do laundry, cook, clean up their own mess, and do other real adult things.

If the parents are creating a failure to launch type of situation or if you stay there into your 30s or 40s, then it's an issue. Staying home in your early 20s to save money and be more prepared for the world is a great move though.

[–] The_Bard@alien.top 1 points 11 months ago

It's a cultural thing. In America you are supposed to get out in the world and live on your own. In Europe people live at home until they can afford a place or get married.

[–] quickclickz@alien.top 1 points 11 months ago

Because for the majority of people (>50%) living with your parents past the age of high school has a similar theme of repercussions as being home-schooled past preschool. The longer you stay in that situation the longer you have less opportunities to develop the skills that you're expected to have by the time you hit 25 and those skills are ones your partner in life would want you to have... just like you wouldn't have as many opportunities to develop the skills your friends would like you have to have if you're home-schooled past preschool age.

Nevermind all the fun experience you inherently are more likely to miss out on when you live with your parents in your most "free years"

[–] blotsfan@alien.top 1 points 11 months ago

Doing this is a large part of why I now own a house.

[–] J12345_@alien.top 1 points 11 months ago

100%. It’s all up to the children, parents, and family dynamics. There’s nothing wrong with living at home with everyone respects each other and the kids save money. I live in CA so it’s hard to do both. I also don’t fault young adults to move out to mature and gain good life experiences. Either way, I don’t fault any side

[–] zamboniman46@alien.top 1 points 11 months ago

i made the decision after college to move 300 miles away from my parents to live near my college gf. she is now my wife and we have an awesome son so things worked out. but man things were fucking TIGHT paying $1k a month for my own 1br 1ba apartment. i wished i could have been saving that money (more realistically i would have saved like $400 a month and spent the other $600 lol)

[–] RyanPelley@alien.top 1 points 11 months ago (2 children)

Nothing bad about it. Just don't be like me. Living with parents my entire 20s and not saving money.

[–] Sternjunk@alien.top 1 points 11 months ago

I got 20k saved up and it still feels like I’ve done absolutely nothing

[–] Dazzling_Aspect2256@alien.top 1 points 11 months ago

Also their fault for allowing this.

[–] ProphetNimd@alien.top 1 points 11 months ago

I definitely think the stigma has lightened up in the last 5 or so years with wages and rent being what they are, but I definitely would advise young people to try to have their own place if they can swing it, even if that means having roommates. It's a big, necessary step in life and I think it's good for young people to taste that freedom well before having to worry about marriage, kids, whatever else usually comes for people soon after. There's no shame in not doing that if you can't/don't want to, but my relationship with my parents became infinitely better once I wasn't living under their roof anymore and I don't regret dealing with roommates in exchange for being able to call my own shots.

[–] __BEEFYHOBO@alien.top 1 points 11 months ago

Because that's not good for the economy or the housing market. Homeownership is meant to be seen as the ultimate goal in American life (even though it comes with almost as many drawbacks and complications as it does positives, unless you have fuck-you money) and that perception is strictly enforced in society and on the internet. Hence "homeowners" being considered a higher cultural class. If people stop consooming and ably-financed people aren't buying houses, that's bad for the machine, and they need to be bullied out of such a mentality.

Not to mention the psychological component where people (especially men) get buttflustered when they see others (especially other men) choosing not to partake in the same trials and tribulations (or, making the same mistakes, depending on how you look at it) that they did, because now they feel their own struggle is invalidated and want to run away from being like they fucked up. They can't beat you intellectually, so they lash out with the "ur not a man"-isms.

[–] tatsumakisenpuukyaku@alien.top 1 points 11 months ago

This is the way. Living together and saving fat stacks is how you get ahead in life. I lived with my parents through college so I had less student loans to pay off. My wife lived with relatives for 3 out of the 5 years we dated, 1 of those being a year we lived with her parents. All rent free. And that's how we were able to save up for a house while padding out retirement savings.

My dad, mom, uncle, aunt, and grandmother all lived under one roof as working class immigrants and they were able to minimize housing costs and maximize the earnings of 5 working adults. That's how they were actually able to jump into middle class (alongside learning English, getting citizenship, and getting government jobs)

[–] kevinhu162@alien.top 1 points 11 months ago

Same. I’m still living at home post-COVID lockdowns, stacking money, and I work remote. I can travel for weeks, months at a time while not worrying about paying rent, and I’ve got a cozy home with homemade dinner and my parents’ company waiting for me whenever my travels conclude. When I’m home, I cook with my mom, help my dad on our farm; I enjoy spending quality time with them before they get too old, even if they drive me crazy sometimes. If I got married, I’d obviously move out but until then, I hate how living with parents is so stigmatized in America.

[–] Transmaniacon89@alien.top 1 points 11 months ago (2 children)

His family is Italian, she probably prefers he live at home.

[–] slightly_inaccurate@alien.top 1 points 11 months ago

Man I'm Italian from New Jersey and all of this is fucking shitty to say about us. Substitute any other race there.

[–] deeesenutz@alien.top 1 points 11 months ago (3 children)

Also living at home is increasingly becoming the reality for a ton of people. Rent in my city is a minimum 1,200 a month for some shitty one bedroom one bath apartment in the part of town where everyone is zombified due to fentanyl. I imagine there are a lot of major cities where 1,200 would be relatively cheap as well. Living with your parents at least through college and until you have a stable job as well as staying on their insurance until the government kicks you off it is like the only way other than being born rich to pursue higher education.

[–] YesOrNah@alien.top 1 points 11 months ago

He’s not your average person. $44k/game.

More power to him but people acting like it’s out of necessity are insane.

[–] J12345_@alien.top 1 points 11 months ago

Lol laughs in SF Bay Area 🥲

[–] BK_95@alien.top 1 points 11 months ago

I pay around $1200 and have a roommate and it feels like a steal for where I live

[–] rupeshjoy852@alien.top 1 points 11 months ago

My wife and I moved back with my parents last year and saved for a house. There is no way I could have saved up for a house otherwise.

[–] Fineous4@alien.top 1 points 11 months ago

In the economy/age we live in now, anything else is hard. Making student loan payments and rents just out of college is ridiculous now.

[–] DeckardsDark@alien.top 1 points 11 months ago (1 children)

if you're 25 making like $50k a year then sure. but he's making close to a million this year and is now set up to make at least a few million more after his performance this season so i think it's a bit odd to live at home in his specific case. guy should have a decent apartment in Hoboken living it up

[–] mizatt@alien.top 1 points 11 months ago

Eh, he's an undrafted backup, no guarantee he'll even be in the league in a few years. I don't think I'd start throwing the money around until there was more in the bank

[–] WhatWouldJediDo@alien.top 1 points 11 months ago

It's way more freaking fun to be an early-20-something having all the independence (and some cash in your pocket if you're lucky) and none of the responsibilities that come later in life. Living with your parents is limiting even if they give you total independence. It's also great experience in taking care of yourself and your own place that will help you down the line.

Of course, there are reasons why living with your parents is better than living alone, too.

[–] quickclickz@alien.top 1 points 11 months ago

yeah the majority of people living with their parents aren't "stacking money"

[–] Drewskeet@alien.top 1 points 11 months ago

Depends on the parents. Personally, I want my kids out at 18-20. I want my house back and to live my life. I don't want to financially support my kids or have a full house forever. My wife and I deserve our independence too. I moved out 3 months after high school graduation, and I love my parents. I wanted my independence and to be on my own. My parents weren't strict at all either. I love my kids, but I also look forward to the day they move out. I'm 39.

[–] yellowtriangles@alien.top 1 points 11 months ago

I'd rather have sex under my own roof

[–] keykey_key@alien.top 1 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Nothing at all. I think people have stereotypes towards people who live with their parents: lazy mooches who DON'T save money. And some people are like that.

As long as you're contributing to the household in some way, I don't think it's an issue at all.

I just don't like people who take advantage of their parents to stay home and do nothing. No school. No work. No helping with household chores. They just stay home and play video games and simply exist.

[–] __BEEFYHOBO@alien.top 1 points 11 months ago

I just don't like people who take advantage of their parents to stay home and do nothing. No school. No work. No helping with household chores. They just stay home and play video games and simply exist.

This is a result of poor parenting, therefore I cry no tears.