this post was submitted on 20 Jan 2025
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[–] meep_launcher@lemm.ee 1 points 3 days ago (1 children)

There was a 32 minute period from initial text to the first response, and then the whole thing was over by minute 3.

That certainly didn't kill an hour. That's like 35 minutes. Something's not right.

I'd go so far as to say OP is a liar. I bald faced full lipped green eyed strong jawed curly haired liar who broke my heart and will do so again.

[–] reallykindasorta@slrpnk.net 1 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (1 children)

I noticed that too but I think the meme is constructed by juxtaposing a twitter post making the claim about how much time it would kill onto a text of someone testing the claim on their friend, so the twitter person turns out to be wrong but no fault should be applied to the text convo.

[–] meep_launcher@lemm.ee 0 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Screenshot of a text convo in the screenshot of a Twitter post in a post on Lemmy- I'm holding you to account reallykindasorta. This rests solely on your broad, muscular shoulders. Quite frankly there's no way to wash your rugged yet tender hands of this mess, and I for one won't stand for it.

They told me the devil would be beautiful.

[–] reallykindasorta@slrpnk.net 1 points 3 days ago

I certainly perpetuated the myth by sharing it. In that case I’m going to defend it and say that this single text anecdote is an outlier and that, on average, this question would take an hour to resolve (including clarifications about weapons and such).

[–] phuntis@sopuli.xyz 1 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago) (6 children)

one of my favourite graphs ever dunno if it's real but eh it's funny

love the difference on geese

personally I'd say rat house cat and medium dog are my definite I'd win not even that difficult maybe maybe the big dog but I dunno the dog could win any of the others are a hard no I'd die

[–] GooberEar@lemmy.wtf 0 points 2 days ago (1 children)

American male: I'm confident up to, but excluding the large dog. Now I'm sure there's a good chance I could win against a large dog, but it's not a big enough chance to call it "confident" and that's the first animal on the list where I can see things going very poorly for me if I don't handle the situation just right.

With the eagle, I'd probably get hurt (badly) and regret it, but what's the chance I'd lose the fight? I mean, their bones are fragile and once a wing is broken, it's game over for them.

Geese? We have Canada geese, amongst other species. They have a well-deserved reputation for their disagreeable personalities (especially when protecting their offspring). They can make you hurt if they wanted to, but an otherwise healthy adult human male can easily win in a fight with them as long as the human doesn't lose his nerve.

[–] Nalivai@lemmy.world 2 points 2 days ago

their bones are fragile and once a wing is broken, it's game over for them.

Your eyes are also very fragile and once they're gone it's over for you, and big birds are very well equipped for that.
And geese can bite your nuts.
I am not confident enough about both of those.
Large dog will fuck up most of humans 9 times out of 10.

[–] Brosplosion@lemm.ee 0 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I'd rather take on a goose than a cat/rat. Geese at least you can get a hold of easily.

[–] phuntis@sopuli.xyz 1 points 2 days ago

bahahahahaha no

[–] tanisnikana@lemmy.world 1 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago)

Have Americans even seen what a goose does?

You’d have a hand around its neck, doing twirls for a shotput throw, and yeah, the goose goes like twenty-five meters back into the lake, and that’s fine.

But with a sinking realization as the goose fucks off, it stole your wallet.

[–] Ibuthyr@lemmy.wtf 0 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Americans are also some of the loudest, over-confident, self-absorbed, entitled people on the planet. Of course they believe they can take on any animal.

My apologies go out to the dozen other Americans who are cool.

[–] LaLuzDelSol@lemmy.world 0 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Please divulge your location so I can talk shit about your country in turn

[–] Ibuthyr@lemmy.wtf 1 points 2 days ago

No problem, there's plenty shit about Germans too! Bunch of conservative assholes that are afraid of change and are fucking weird in general. Especially the people in East Germany and Bavaria. Bunch of cunts is what they are. Except for the dozen of people that are cool of course.

[–] chetradley@lemm.ee 0 points 4 days ago (2 children)
[–] tetris11@lemmy.ml 2 points 2 days ago

Only a holy hand grenade could defeat a creature so vile

[–] Dicska@lemmy.world 1 points 3 days ago

Have you ever tried to bathe a house cat?

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 0 points 4 days ago (1 children)

There is a family legend about an amorous goose. I don't know it well enough to tell it properly though, I wasn't there when it happened. But I do not understand the Statesian confidence in goose warfare.

[–] Glytch@lemmy.world 0 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Our confidence comes from experience. Canada has been sending their worst at us for generations. We fight geese as children.

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 0 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (1 children)

That's the secret. They're all the worst goose.

[–] Glytch@lemmy.world 0 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I meant that in kind of a Trump "they're not sending their best" kind of way.

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 0 points 2 days ago (1 children)

i gotchu. i'm just racist against geese is what i'm trying to say

[–] Glytch@lemmy.world 1 points 2 days ago

That's only because you've been around them. Also, same.

[–] Majorllama@lemmy.world 0 points 4 days ago (1 children)

I would say unarmed unprepared combat I could do a coyote. I would be super fucked up but I think I could take one.

[–] NakariLexfortaine@lemm.ee 0 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Their bites aren't as bad as you might think. They can fuck you up, but they rely on pretty quick attacks, so the risk is more in repeated strikes(from what we've seen with the limited coyote attacks that happen).

Don't recommend going for a straight-on brawl, but if you can get behind one, you might have a chance. Bonus points, they're naturally pretty disinclined to fight a human unless given no other options, so you might be able to slip behind at a point?

[–] nekbardrun@lemmy.world 1 points 2 days ago

What if I bring treats? Or maybe 5 kg of raw meat? What is the probability that I win?