Leopards Ate My Face

He is self-aware at least, I'll give 'em that.

Help promised by the USA for giving away their nukes.

That was a Babylon Bee link. Right-wing version of The Onion.

Unfortunately there’s a lot of criminal justice jobs that only require a two year technical degree. Depending on location and school it’s likely that it was “check the boxes” kind of program for a field that is understaffed.

Maybe I'm on my stem high horse here, but why does a college degree not specifically about business require a financial literacy workshop? Like if its a gen ed that's fine, though its really a high school level class.

This was a GLORIOUS format! I missed the Herman Cain award mini stories and this was a breath of stank air.

Unburdened of her life's savings, apparently.

Most of boomers will have their 401k (unknowingly) invested into the stock market by their employers

That's not what a 401(k) is. A 401(k) is just a regular investment account that has special rules around taxes because it's meant to be cashed out when you retire. Everything in a 401(k) is in the stock market (though it can include bonds, mutual funds, etc. too), and none of it is managed by the employer. The employer just makes contributions that the employee decides how to manage.

It's entirely possible that people don't understand their 401(k)s, and that the employer went with a full service broker that manages the 401(k)s on behalf of the employees. But, it's not possible for the employer to invest 401(k)s into the stock market because the employer simply makes cash contributions and then it's hands off.

Pensions are different. Pensions are things where the company agrees to pay the employee a certain amount when they retire. In that case the employer is definitely investing in the stock market -- although, in this case, they almost certainly hire a company to manage it for them.

That's what a 401(k) is though. If it's unknowing then they just know it's a savings account. Being mad you weren't told that fact is like being mad you weren't told your health insurance involved giving some of your paycheck to a third party who will only give some back if you get sick.

Pensions I agree with you there, pensions are a black box where you put money in, they decide how to manage it, and money comes back out when you're old

That's actually a pretty good return, but only helps people with cash lying around, which generally are already rich fucks.

It also assumes this is the bottom. That $2000 could become $1000 and it may take years and years and years to get to $2500 instead.

There is no indication this is the bottom.

Better broke than woke **tm

/s

This isn't a temporary crash. This is upending trade policies that took 75+ years to establish and work out. Using the post WW2 reconstruction of global currency that we practically dictated to the world. We put ourselves in a position of unparalleled power in the new world economy by convincing everyone in the world that we were a stable and trustworthy government who wouldn't ever betray them.

You can't bring that back by just "dropping" tariffs.

There's a literal boycott on US goods right now across the world. Nobody's buying our shit, and I don't blame them.

We're intentionally fucking up the global economy, for absolutely no fucking reason, other than this dementia addled dipshit thinks trade is bad and tariffs are good.

That's literally the closest thing to saying the earth is flat, from an economists standpoint.

This is going to take DECADES to recover from. If the market is lucky.

We just shot ourselves in the foot with a Russian donated AK-47 on full auto and didn't let off the trigger until both of our feet were just shredded piles of bone and meat, and the ricochets also caught all of our friends standing next to us in their feet as well. Not as badly as we shot ourselves, but more than they were expecting I suspect.