this post was submitted on 15 Jul 2025
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Not The Onion

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[–] captainlezbian@lemmy.world 3 points 6 days ago (1 children)

Oh, and what should we do with the macroparticles of lead that are so prevalent in our bodies?

[–] Rivalarrival@lemmy.today 1 points 6 days ago

Best way to prevent the accumulation of unwanted lead macroparticles is to take a lesson from Han Solo and shoot first.

[–] MangioneDontMiss@lemmy.ca 1 points 5 days ago

Let them eat less cake!

[–] Susaga@sh.itjust.works 188 points 1 week ago (2 children)
[–] danekrae@lemmy.world 81 points 1 week ago (3 children)

To bad americans don't have balls like the French.

[–] FrowingFostek@lemmy.world 1 points 6 days ago

If we're taking the French citizenry I agree.

[–] sturlabragason@lemmy.world 16 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)
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[–] AbsolutelyNotAVelociraptor@sh.itjust.works 108 points 1 week ago (4 children)

Worried about medicaid cuts? Just stop getting/being sick, duh!

It's really that simple!

[–] chaosCruiser@futurology.today 42 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

Alternatively, you could stop being so poor. Simple as that!

[–] Tollana1234567@lemmy.today 2 points 6 days ago (1 children)

you can buy your 5th house to rent and draw from your multimillionaire trust fund.

[–] chaosCruiser@futurology.today 1 points 6 days ago* (last edited 6 days ago) (1 children)

You can also borrow 100 million, build some commercial properties, and lease them to tenants.

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[–] markovs_gun@lemmy.world 78 points 1 week ago (2 children)

This is the whole crux of MAHA. Make health a completely personal choice by denying any external causes of disease and then when you completely cut any possible health assistance then that's fine because health is a completely personal choice and responsibility and people should just try harder to he healthy

[–] atzanteol@sh.itjust.works 37 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (2 children)

Didn't forget the part where you get to blame people for their own illness! Being sick now becomes a moral failing because you didn't do enough to stay healthy.

[–] xorollo@leminal.space 2 points 6 days ago

Being sick is a moral failing just like being poor or being ugly. /S

Btw, have y'all seen the mar-a-lago face? That one IS a personal choice. And WOW what a choice.

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[–] karashta@sopuli.xyz 49 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Oh cool. Not eating cake will surely clear up the brain damage from my head trauma

[–] TheReanuKeeves@lemmy.world 4 points 6 days ago

You obviously left out the part about how you OD'd on cake then fell down the stairs like the addict you are. Pathetic

[–] Iheartcheese@lemmy.world 16 points 1 week ago (1 children)
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[–] user224@lemmy.sdf.org 40 points 1 week ago

Avocado toast 2.0

[–] D_C@sh.itjust.works 33 points 1 week ago

That is absolutely useless advice. Guys, if you are worried about the cuts then simply just make more money to give to your insurance companies! Or ask daddy for a bigger trust fund.
See, easy.

Right, I'm tired after giving you that FREE advice so I'm off to my second holiday home for a week or two to recharge my batteries before my annual month summer holiday.

[–] Oyml77@lemmy.today 17 points 1 week ago

With rhetotic like that, "Dr." Oz may need to start worrying about neck cuts.

[–] Valmond@lemmy.world 7 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Dr Oz, it sounds like a fairytale.

[–] Simulation6@sopuli.xyz 24 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I think the 'Dr' part is at this point.

[–] Steamymoomilk@sh.itjust.works 3 points 6 days ago

The DR is actually a acronym specifically for him.

Commonly confused with DR Meaning doctor.

It actually means

Dipshit Rat

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