I always thought it was purely social conditioning, but I've got a theory that just popped in my head. I wonder if women need to be more vocal to communicate "Yes that's good, keep doing that"? Like frankly my partner is often in charge of pace, depth, and even calling for position changes. I'm letting him know with my noises how good something is for me, If you should keep doing it, or if I get quiet he knows to try something different. I don't mind him being quiet at all, until I'm on top and then I'm like I literally cannot tell if this is good for you. I have to ask out loud "is that good?" And then change something, "is that good?" After a blow-job I have to ask him, what parts did you like more than the other parts? Obviously I can tell he's into it overall, but It's really hard to know if a rhythm or amount of pressure is better than another if moaning doesn't increase when you try something. Like he can absolutely tell when he hits a good spot when fingering me because my moans make it very obvious. I will straight say, "yes," "please," "right there," "don't move." All kinds of stuff. It's not just about making it hotter for the other person, it's about communicating how good something is for you so they don't have to do as much guessing
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I just figured the guy's concentrating on keeping up the good work without blowing it.
Yeah. I mean if he's blowing it the she probably feels left out.
I've also always thought it may have to do with social conditioning, but possibly on a non-sexual level. My thought is that guys are (generally) conditioned to be more quiet about intimate things, or things that are good, and more loud in "aggressive" situations. This fits well with the factual observation that men are less likely to talk about personal problems with a friend, and more likely to push the boundaries (be vocal) in an interview. In my head, it's an extension of the "strong, silent" stereotype, which is often regarded as positive. Women, on the other hand, are (typically) socially conditioned to be more vocal about feelings in general. I wouldn't be surprised if these conditionings bleed over into how vocal people are during sex.
With that said: I'm a guy, and my gf likes it when I make noises. Once I got used to it, I also learned to enjoy grunting. Grunting is highly recommended.
I make some noise, no idea how enjoyable it is for the other person, mostly alot of grunting or abusive language. It gets comedic when I’m like, “Yeah bitch, I’m gonna fuck that pussy all night.” Then I cum like 10 seconds later.
This is why lesbians have better sex.
You have fingers and a mouth, you don't need to stop fucking all night after you cum.
As a straight, I wish I had fingers and a mouth. At least I can have multiple orgasms. Suck it, penis-owners!
Suck it, penis-owners!
Look, if we could we would, but then you'd never see us again.
As a straight, I wish I had fingers and a mouth.
Words cannot describe my confusion.
This is the funniest honesty I've heard in a long time. Thank you.
Dude, got a tip for you. Make some noise. She'll love it.
She likes it when I do the Bob Ross voice
Because of this : https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Female_copulatory_vocalizations
Thank you for posting this. I knew a woman's orgasm had a purpose in insemination but vocalizations indicating the best time for male ejaculation makes sense.
And about a billion times more sense than some of the nonsense posted in this thread.
A lot of that bs has been disproven. Orgasm plays next to no reproductive function (beyond, ya know, incentivising us to wanna bone)
On the other hand, recent studies have indicated that most copulatory vocalizations in women do not accompany their own orgasm, but rather their partner's ejaculation. The study showed that the man typically finds the woman's vocalization arousing and highly exciting, and that the woman herself is aware of this.
Vocalizations can be used intentionally by women in order to boost the self-esteem of their partner and to cause quicker ejaculation.
Ha, name a woman that hasn't done this to hurry along bad sex.
Try it sometime, my wife loves it and I grew to not be shy about it. There is something about letting out moans and noises that makes sex so much better.
I started screaming. It's basically a heavy metal concert in our room now.
Hell yeah, brother. Helps you get into that primal mode.
You guys are all over thinking this. A lot. I'm pretty sure it's because basically all porn has a very loud female role and a near silent male role. There's been lots of studies on how porn affects people's actual sex lives. Vocalization is a part of that. Girls watch it in formative years, learn "This must be what my partner will find hot," just like tons of other emulated behavior from other media. Boys do the same.
my gf loves it when i make noise
Same reason dogs don't bark when they chase the mail truck.
Porn has done it for dozens of years at this point, and it has just become not only an expectation, but just a thing that gets picked up.
See moaning and panting and the softly whispered "fuuuuucky yes" more as a means of expressing arousal and excitement. My SO is fairly vocal (involuntarily, I love it), but I had to learn it first. It really feels good tho', I suppose it depends on what your partner wants/likes?
Before I transitioned I was pretty much silent. Hormones affected that some, but I have to say I got way more vocal post-op. First time I got it in the vagina I was quite loud.
I think some of it is just what genitals people are rocking.
As a trans woman, I noticed it started happening fully unintentionally after HRT. It's anecdotal, but makes me feel like there's definitely a chemical component because it actually surprised me.
I wonder how much of that is placebo effect.
My honest guess is all of it
I grunt and moan to signify my effort and enjoyment.
gonna agree with conditioning - we've been indoctrinated (by society) to behave in certain ways - like "men dont cry", etc (they do). people acting in certain ways in certain situations is normal - and expected. we've been programmed to expect it and respond to it.
I find myself trying to pay attention to how she responds.