Photography

Over the top and pretentious stories about an image. And the stupid sayings photographers use in business. “Preserving your memories”. “Capturing your moment in time”. It’s a fucking pictures. Get over it.

1- when people dress their pets. I know it's their pet, but I hate to see animals in costumes

2- when people assume that the camera is reason for the great picture of their pet, that the person behind the camera had nothing to do with the final image

Long exposure waterfalls. Or just long exposure water for that matter. There is not much I think looks worse than people turning flowing water into some wild looking fluffy stuff.

Events Photographer here, lots of nightlife stuff but also private functions like birthday, engagement parties, corporate events, weddings.

Pet peeve for nightlife, is when people straight up make getting their photo a big deal to not get a photo. When theres a group of 3 or 4 girls, I asked them for a photo for the venue, one of them will say no and the others will want a photo, but she doesn't move out of the way. I am fairly directive because I have a job to do and need to get paid so I tell her to jog on.

Private function wise, is when guests straight up just refuse to have their photo taken - you have been invited by the host, the host wants photos of you, if you don't want a photo taken, then you should leave.

I know I'm being pretty harsh but as Taylor Swift once said "you need to calm down"

I bought a camera to photograph stuff, but I can't figure out what to photograph. I used to sit on my deck and photograph vape bottles and stuff.

Smartphone companies advertising their 128 megapixel phone camera. They know most people will hear that and think "WOW, 128 MEGAPIXELS!!"

The photo of a taxi that’s been monochromed, other than the taxi. The generic, not level, iPhone sunset pictures. And the flower up close with lots of bokeh behind it.

Genres becoming a bit more fuzzy. I hate photographic gatekeepers/ing, and I feel like when people say "That's not a real [genre]" might come across as a bit too stuffy, not having a good definition for a genre does make entering competitions or attending galleries a bit of a crapshoot. Is "Astro Photography" nebulae and planets? Or is it the milky way over a canyon? Is macro photography just really close to something? Or does it need to be at least 1:1?

Hashtagging an up close picture of a flower as "Macro" or a milky way shot over a barn as "Astro" is "whatever" in my book, but when an astro photography competition is expecting only night-landscapes-with-milky-way-shots (or worse, star trails), I definitely feel duped.

OK, here is one more: hope I’m not stepping on anyone’s toes, this is specific to the X100V groups on Facebook. When someone posts a nice set of images, the first question they get in the comments is “great photos, what film recipe did you use?”.

I was pretty annoyed at my wedding photographer. She missed several key moments and it was very expensive. I'm not a pro, but I've shot a few events before and I struggle to see how someone who does it every day wouldn't be much better.

So I guess that's like a wild peeve

I hate pictures taken with a fisheye lens

One of my biggest ones lately is in the film community. It's film snobs who shit on teenagers and other young photographers who are "only getting into film for the aesthetic" as if all photography, as a visual medium, isn't about the aesthetic.

Horizons. The amount of crooked horizons in peoples pictures is mine. Sports photography is my thing. And players who look like they're skating / running up or down hill on a level surface, really grinds my gears. And it is such a simple fix.

Asking how much to charge for your services.

Saying that by putting a full frame lens on a crop sensor you get extra zoom.

You’re not getting any extra zoom, you just have a smaller field of view by comparison to a full frame

Claiming that a phone is equal to a camera

People that are uncle tom’ing and ask me for my number one piece of advice; yea, take your lens cap off my dude… you’re gonna miss every photo you see when you’ve gotta take the cap off before shooting.

How much “bokeh” is misunderstood. It can be good or bad, not more or less.

“How much zoom does that have?” when I’m using a (rented) 600 f/4. It doesn’t zoom…

Photographers who look at others work and say “that’s great!” when there are so many things wrong with it, and firstly the person’s facial expression is garbage.

People who used Godox lights before and have switched to Profoto, and assume they can see the power of every light in the trigger. The new trigger can do it but only with the newest lights, and the number of people who think Profoto can fix the old trigger is astonishing, or that “it should work that way because of the price”. Listen idiot, if you’ve been using their gear since before TTL you’d understand.

Those who think the front diffusion of a softbox is all-powerful and can reset the inverse square law to restart there. Um, no; get out your light meter, measure it, and do the math.

People shooting with their lens hood on backwards. Sometimes there is a reason to shoot with no hood, but then just take it off and leave it in the bag.

How they hold the lens. I know some professionals hold the lens in a c shape with the elbow out, but to me it screams amateur.

People who over-process in post, to the point that it looks ridiculous.