this post was submitted on 30 Jan 2026
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Programmer Humor

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‘Why let mere mortals decide CPU priorities when the cosmos can guide us?’ asks the developer.

Here's the GitHub repo. It is glorious.

This scheduler is 100% for educational and entertainment purposes. While the astronomical calculations are real and the scheduler actually works (it really does load into the kernel and schedule tasks!), using astrology to schedule CPU tasks is:

  • Scientifically dubious
  • Cosmically hilarious
  • Fully functional with real retrograde detection and lunar phase scheduling
  • Not recommended for production systems (but it boots and runs stably)
  • Perfect for conference talks, hackathons, and proving that anything is possible
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[–] azimir@lemmy.ml 19 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Brilliant.

I'd put it up there with the CPU emulator done in LaTeX.

[–] bridgeenjoyer@sh.itjust.works 10 points 1 month ago

I trust this more than an LLM

[–] PowerCrazy@lemmy.ml 8 points 1 month ago

This is just using dev/rand/ but with extra steps.

[–] orc_princess@lemmy.ml 4 points 1 month ago

This made me giggle, thanks for sharing