Here is legitimately how I did it, no exaggeration. I sent the following message to all of the contacts I wanted to keep (or something similar, I don't have access to the message anymore):

"Hey, I'm leaving Facebook permanently. I only use the chat function anyway, and I don't want to use it given their business practices. Here's my phone number, email, signal, and XMPP. Pick one, I don't care which."

And then I logged off for a month, logged back on, and deleted my account. I wasn't sure if they'd still get the message if I deleted my account after, plus I have ADHD and wanted to give myself a chance to remember anyone else I wanted to keep in touch with. I lost one person in the move, and they weren't someone I talked to that often anyway.

Only way: don't use their products. Fuck what everyone else does, if they are your friend they will text you or get on signal, end of story. People are fucking idiots

I'm gonna be super for real with you. If your friends won't download an extra app to message you on then they're not really that good of a friend. It's such a small inconvenience. Omg I have to hit this other button on my touchscreen instead and spend 5 minutes setting it up?

This is how I'd do it. You send a message to your friends on instagram and whatsapp with your signal info and say, "Hey, not gonna be checking [this app] often and won't have notifs on. Trying to be more responsible about my data, and social media use. If you need me or want to chat hit me up on Signal."

If their response to that is "Okay well I don't want to so I won't talk to you anymore." Then they're not a friend worth keeping around anyway. Real friends are the people who will wake up at 3am and come pick you up from the airport when your coming home. Because they actually care about you, and when you actually care about someone you do inconvenient things for them.

Now, if by "friend" you mean some person you've never met that you chat with online sometimes and send funny videos to or whatever? That's not really what I'd call a friend to begin with, and you'll just have to accept that relationship isn't very deep and it's totally normal for them not to want to do something just to talk to you. And in that case you have to decide if you'd rather stop talking to them, or stay on the other apps. That's entirely a you decision at that point.

Yes, stop. Bring it up when they bring it up and wait. In the meantime say « I will be on Signal if you search me or text if it’s necessary » and delete everything

This is how I ask my contacts on WhatsApp to move to Signal.

Each message to be sent on WhatsApp/Signal is separated by a horizontal line. Separating them makes WhatsApp/Signal render link previews nicely - wait for the preview to appear before sending each message. After copy-pasting from Lemmy to WhatsApp/Signal, you may have to correct the formatting by adding [Shift+Enter] where a line feed has disappeared, or to re-bold subheadings by selecting text and clicking the [B]-button.

It is not safe for Europeans to use WhatsApp.

WhatsApp is owned by the US company Meta, whose largest shareholder and decision-maker is Mark Zuckerberg, a billionaire Trump supporter. Meta’s business model has always been based on the use and resale of data extracted from and spied on users of its free services for all manner of purposes. The $16 billion acquisition of WhatsApp was not an act of charity, but an investment designed to get users’ conversations onto their servers.

WhatsApp’s source code is secret, so no impartial party can verify whether the app’s owner is able to read all message histories or not. Even if this were not currently possible, new updates are released constantly, and a backdoor could be added at any time – for example, if Trump ordered it – and under US law, a company operating there is obliged to comply with government orders.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/WhatsApp#Switzerland
"
In December 2021, the Swiss army banned the use of WhatsApp and several other non-Swiss encrypted messaging services by army personnel. The ban was prompted by concerns of US authorities potentially accessing user data for such apps because of the CLOUD Act.
"

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lawsuits_involving_Meta_Platforms
"
... collecting biometric data of their Facebook and Instagram users without their consent and then sharing it with third parties and not deleting it in time, despite Meta announcing that it would delete all data it had collected ...
"

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mark_Zuckerberg#Politics
"
Zuckerberg was one of a handful of technology leaders positioned prominently at Trump's inauguration. ... In January 2025, he said: "We now have a U.S. administration that is proud of our leading companies, prioritizes American technology winning and that will defend our values and interests abroad."
...
Zuckerberg has expressed opposition to EU regulations of his company saying "we're going to work with President Trump to push back on governments around the world that're going after American companies."
"

The leakage of detailed information to foreign powers is dangerous for Europe, particularly now that artificial intelligence can sift through mountains of data and identify ways in which Europe could be most effectively undermined by manipulating individual citizens.

Europeans mostly use US software and online services, and the data collected from these enables highly accurate micro-targeted advertising.

It is suspected that Brexit and Trump were brought about through the use of personalised propaganda.

https://www.theguardian.com/technology/2017/may/07/the-great-british-brexit-robbery-hijacked-democracy

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Surveillance_capitalism

I recommend replacing WhatsApp with a similar app called ‘Signal’, which is open-source and developed by a foundation.

Messages don't move between Signal and WhatsApp, but they can be ‘shared’ one by one from one app to the other.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Signal_(software)

On Signal, finding contacts by phone number has sometimes been a bit hit-and-miss, but searching by username has always worked. You can choose your username in Signal’s settings. When you share your username, your phone number is not revealed to the other party in the conversation unless you specifically provide it, just as with email. Setting up Signal without a phone number is a paid feature.

When the person has moved from WhatsApp to Signal, I send them the following messages.

Signal can save your message history to its own cloud, but this does not happen automatically; the setting can be found under Settings/Backups. With the free cloud package, storage space for media files is limited.

If you do not use Signal’s paid cloud service, you can keep your entire message history (including images and videos) safe from device damage or loss using one of the following methods:

• Install Signal on another device that you are unlikely to lose at the same time as your other device, for example in a fire or burglary. Your chat history will synchronise via an internet connection whilst the devices are switched on.
• Download a backup file from Signal regularly and store it somewhere else. A file left on your phone will likely end up in your phone’s operating system’s backup cloud, provided this feature is switched on and covers the folder where you saved the file.

If an old, decommissioned device contains an old message history that you wish to transfer to new devices, simply update Signal to a sufficiently recent version that is capable of synchronising histories between devices. Check whether media files older than the free cloud's time limit were transferred or if you need to pass a backup file.

You can improve the quality of the photos and videos you send by going to Settings/Data usage/Media quality: High. There is no ‘Original quality’ option.

You can bypass compression and resizing, which reduce quality, by hiding media files inside a zip file (or equivalent), which Signal will send as is. This is useful for maximising the quality of an image sent for printing, or if the image contains text that is so small it cannot be read unless it is in its original quality.

If the person is interested in privacy and information security, I send them these:

Try going somewhere without being spotted by a surveillance car made in the US or China. A European in Europe cannot escape an agent of a foreign power.

- Oblivious human drone swarm attack -
Pre-emptive manipulation of society by nudge swarms around vigilant targets, as orchestrated by surveillance capitalist companies

Surveillance capitalist companies study people to better manipulate their behaviour by advertisements. That skill can be used to attack a vigilant target using oblivious mediators as a drone swarm delivering a payload.

https://lemmy.world/post/52470551 (needs JavaScript)

Another way to the same post:
https://piefed.social/c/aboringdystopia@lemmy.world/p/2429126/pre-emptive-manipulation-of-society-by-nudge-swarms-around-vigilant-targets-as-orchestr

Another way to the same post:
https://scribe.disroot.org/post/11576201

For your computer and tablet running Microsoft Windows or Google Chrome operating systems, Fedora Linux is a good option (there are many others). Linux can also be installed to Apple devices. If you prefer Apple style or must use a touchscreen, choose the default version of Fedora (or Debian) with Gnome desktop environment, but if you prefer Windows style, choose the one with KDE Plasma. Linux Mint also resembles Windows, and is slightly easier to set up because you can get proprietary codecs for playing media files by checking a box, while in Fedora you have to do it on the terminal.

For your Android phone or tablet, several alternative operating systems are available. The AOSP-based ones are almost entirely Android-compatible, best of which is GrapheneOS. The Linux-based ones (Jolla phone, Nura, Ubuntu Touch) can also run Android apps, but I haven't tried them.

GrapheneOS - maximum security and privacy for phones and tablets

• More Android apps than on other deGoogled OSs
• Very secure (hack-resistant) if correctly set up and used
• Easy to install to the few phones it accepts (some Google, some Motorola 2027)
• Beginner-hostile, complicated manual setup
• Good website and active forum
• NextCloud works - prefer GrapheneOS sponsors, consider Murena to support /e/OS (another deGoogled Android-compatible OS, beginner-friendly, technically inferior, installable to more devices)

I use /e/OS on a Sony phone:
https://www.quora.com/How-does-Murenas-custom-e-OS-compare-to-Googles-Android/answer/Harri-K-Hiltunen

The battery last a week in sparse use without Android's constant surveillance wasting energy.

If they haven't come to the conclusion that it matters after being presented with information, then they aren't going to change their minds. And you are wasting your breath trying.

Even in our home I'm a privacy advocate (selfhost immich, pihole, Linux machines, GrapheneOS) my wife knows the larger consequence of engaging on platoforms that glean your info, but she lives on Facebook, Instagram, google services etc.

Even a friend who is highly intelligent, doesn't care about privacy; Because he believes he's done nothing wrong so why would he care if the government agencies could gather all info without proper warrants. I had the conversation about the larger issue being that a government is then able to use the info to silence protest against its own actions. He assumes I'm just paranoid.

So I just don't bother further

Do you really need facebook and instagram? I think using whatsapp is enough for people to reach you, so at least cutting down number of meta services would be good.

I personally don't see getting instagram feeds or facebook feeds as vital, since being reachable and being able to chat is more important while reels and pics is whatever. And those who use Instagram and facebook probably have whatsapp, so they can dm you there.

~~Instagram~~👉Pixelfed

Only Criminals Will Try To Hide Their Conversation

Jokes on them, pretty soon everything will be a crime.

Any Recommended Stratergy To make them ditch Meta ?

I would say just quit facebook yourself if you want to quit (and you should). Trying to get other people to do things they don't want to do is obnoxious, short of staging an intervention if it's serious self-harm. They can quit when they're ready to.

You can't. Accept that statement. Acknowledge that you're only in control of your body. You can influence others, but you cannot control them. Align yourself with your beliefs without forcing your beliefs onto others.

I know users would like to interject, probably with something like "these aren't beliefs; they're objectively bad." I would agree with that criticism. Beliefs are sometimes aligned with reality and other times they're not. I believe proprietary-software is evil and I agree with a lot of things Richard Stallman has written.

From the outside I know a lot of people don't understand and I'm fine with that--I'm not in control of others nor do I want to be (that would be a tremendous burden). I do what I want to do, which is a reflection of my beliefs. When your body aligns with your desires (which stem from your beliefs) you'll be most content.

I don't want a Google account. I think creating a Google account is actively causing harm. If someone suggest Facebook, Instagram, Whatsapp, et al as a way of communicating I refuse. If they inquire I'll explain my reasoning if I perceive their curiosity to be genuine and offer an alternative solution, but the thing I want to impress upon you here is that I'm doing what I want to do.

People have written and said particulars to me that I know others see my behaviour as a type of "self-restraint" or to phrase it another way: of forgoing convenience in favour of something. They perceive the action of adhering to libre-software as a burden. It's not. It's what I want to do. It's what I like to do. (It's what excites and brings me pleasure.)

I'd probably like it if other people also shared my preferences and I know some do. I also know some don't. I think they should, but I don't want to shoulder that burden. It's an impossible load. I can't force people to do what I think is the correct thing to do. It is impossible. It's also probably wrong--most definitely wrong.

Do what you want to do and accept that others are doing what they want to do. If there's conflict try to resolve it. If it can not be resolved to the satisfaction of both parties part ways amicably.

If you think you can coerce someone with enough persistence--and if you're using this thread to gain motivation to continue--you're in the wrong. Do not do it.

I was listening to an interview with Meredith Whitaker (Signal's CEO) yesterday on the Futurology Podcast. Her response to the "I have nothing to hide" comment was to imagine being sat down in a room and given access to a database of every text you've ever sent. Imagine that searchable database is not just at your disposal. Every bad day you've ever had complaining about your boss to a coworker, people, especially lawyers, love to take things out of context.

I deleted my Meta accounts when Zuck became openly sycophantic towards Trump.

If my friends want to talk to me, they text me. Some even got Signal because I told them it was my preferred messaging app.

If they want to send a social media post/reel to me, they can text me with the link to it and I can view it in browser.

You can’t force your friends to care about surveillance, but you can choose to do what you believe is right, and your real friends will accommodate you, even if they don’t understand.

If you are really serious about this, then you need to rank whatever you should stop using (meta, google and other shit) by a grade of necessity then act upon that grade ranking.

Below are some examples of what i mean,

• Your loved one, mother, father and family use an app, then i would shelf it to be ditched as a last resort (S tier)
• your cacual crew and gym friends use instagram, then delete immediately since you check on them whenever you see them.
• your work collegues relies on WhatsApp then fuck it and delete immediately, when asked for a reason say i stopped using it, if they need something urgent “just call or reach out via matrix or text”
• your girlfriend uses facebook to share stories, tell her that you are deleting your account and she can share her stories on matrix or directly show you on her phone.
• your close friends use some shitty Zionist app, tell them clearly that you will not use that anymore and they should also follow your footsteps, but make sure that they can still text you via an alternative tech when needed.

Its a journey that you need to take.

I made such changes when i saw an official UN report clearly stating how most of those tech companies are actively killing children and helping Israel with genocide, tbh from that point i have probably set my priorities right.

I mean if jon from the gym is mad that he can’t send me reels anymore, that is not something i really wieght against being an ad feeder to a company that is helping killing children.

I have no advice. Been trying to get people to quit for years at this point with no luck.

Well, you can't tell people to stop using a service that everyone does and is basically their primary communications platform...

People have like 100 apps on their phones and will download another 10 with no thought if it's mainstream enough. So the way I see it is that they can download one more app that is respecting their rights. I would understand if someone told me that they do not want another app for security/privacy and they already use some other that does meet those criteria but I have yet to meet someone like that.

So far I just tell people that I use signal and every fucking time I have to tell them that I do not sell drugs because that is the first question if they are below 40. Most don't really care and just do it some don't but they are not close contacts so...

Get better friends

Be brave just do it.

I haven’t deleted my accounts yet, but I just don’t use anything Facebook. No apps in my phone and don’t login on computer. I’ve lost touch with some and missed out on a lot of news about loved ones. But I can’t have it both ways, so I’ve grieved my loss and moved on. Even if their business practices weren’t so vile, I can’t handle the content not being chronological.

I have contemplated setting up a server for photo sharing, but I doubt anyone will participate. So now I just send text messages or use shared albums with iOS users.

You don't need Meta products to stay in touch with, especially Whatsapp. If they refuse to use Signal, just use RCS/SMS. Or if you live in European Union, you can use Balsio/Haiket/Arnacon, they are interoperable with Whatsapp. The disadvantage is that Balsio and Haiket work ONLY if downloaded from Google Play, while Arnacon works anyway.

I wouldn't trust signal either. Like for some stuff, but the US probably has a backdoor.

Just leave. I left in February last year. I made a post on facebook announcing that I'd be leaving the following week and that if people wanted to stay in contact with me, they could find me on my email, on Signal or call or text me if they had my number. I proceeded to gradually delete things manually. I am under no illusion that my pictures and posts aren't saved somewhere in some database despite me deleting them, but I did it as a ritual and also in order to "pass time" while I waited for most of my contacts to have seen my message.

I found a tutorial on how to delete your facebook profile (this is one of the newer walkthroughs, and yes, it is fucking ridiculous), because that button is hidden several layers deep into your page so that only the most persistent mf'ers can find it while most people may go look and end up thinking "urgh, too much of a bother" and then just leave it for a later that never comes.

I was genuinely surprised that there were anyone who followed me to Signal, but people did and now, a year and a half later, I have grown a kinda long list of friends and family on my Signal and have heard that some of them have started using Signal as an alternative to other messaging and video call services with their loved ones. Most of these people were very iffy about joining Signal in the beginning. They lowkey feared it because it was new to them and they had heard bad stories from the news, but after learning how to use it and realize that there is nothing scary about it, they all seem pretty chill with it.

I am tired of telling my friends to stop using Instagram.

Don't do that. Tell them where they can find you if they want to stay in touch. :D If you want a bird to come to you of its own free will, you have to leave the window open instead of chasing it through and closing it. Respect its autonomy and right to choose, and it will be way more open to come to you.

Any Recommended Stratergy To make them ditch Meta ?

Again, you cannot make anyone ditch Meta. It is a misguided way to think of it. I do understand that a lot of discomfort comes with being the first to do something within your social sphere. That is also what made me hesitant to leave facebook for several years. That and I didn't know of any alternative to messenger which was the only mode of contact I had with my best friend, who lives on a different continent than mine. The minute I learned about Signal and she agreed to join it, I was gone.

My friend herself hasn't left Meta. None of my friends and family have left Meta and I will never tell them to do so. At most, I will tell them why I left. However, I have noticed how some are starting to use Signal more than messenger. One of my family members prefers Signal to Messenger because they like the video call option better on Signal than on Messenger.

I have lost touch with a ton of people by leaving, btw. A ton. I don't care much. I don't see it as a loss. If I feel the urge to stay in contact with someone, I will reach out. Sometimes they reach out to me out of the blue. I like that.

I also like that when I get updates from friends and family, it isn't from some feed on some platform, but from their own mouths.

I don't have FOMO. I don't feel left out. It was scary to leave initially, because you have been used to having access to everything, but life with less access is actually nice. I like that it has become a tiny bit harder to stay up to date on what's going on around me. It has been rewarding.

It's been a year and a half for me and I am currently reading more books, watching more movies and I feel more present in my own life. I barely remember what it is that I actually "lost" by leaving. Not much, other than a level of stress that I didn't really know was there until I shut down my profiles. Highly recommend! As long as you get into the mindset of accepting that you cannot control what other people do nor should you.

Is there any way to flee from Grindr? I want to use an open source alternative to that app.

https://lemmy.world/post/53252379

Most of the people who claim to be friends are not. How much value $$$ do these “friends” bring to the table. Fuck the gipity fuck big tech. Be a bull just say not. Cut the turds lose. This requires bravery and a high IQ.