DirtyCNC

I'm sorry to hear you got bit.

No problem. I'd take a gruesome, mind-wrecking rabies death over Trump any day if it didn't entail so much suffering for everyone around. So yeah, I thoroughly disinfected the wound. The election scar on my soul will stay way past 2029 though, if I love that long.

My parents nor I would take the "stop" very well because I would end up doing stupid shit. See my comment with the cat pic.

Thanks but my discipline is terrible so today I did mostly the same shit as yesterday. I succeeded at trapping a free-roaming cat that's been coming to eat but after half an hour sitting in the cage with it I grew no closer to befriending it, just got bitten. Oh well, at least you get a cat pic.

I sent the "progress" report to my coach and she told me I don't have to bother coming next week, as there is no point when I can't follow her advice.

I replied positively to a course offer at uni that will make this "gap year" at least somewhat productive, so there's that. I still have to type out the email to the psychiatrist before I go to sleep.

The college is impractically far and commuting makes me tired. My parents are at home in the afternoon but they are way too aggressive at trying to get me to work, I am already too tired most of the time and can't focus when they're watching. I tried dad's office but his boss is not happy with my frequent toilet visits and I don't get too productive there either. The problem is: they're right, the only time I'm productive is when there is somebody around but they just wreck my mood when they're behind my back so there is a huge cost: I get 0-10 minutes of productivity for every evening spent crying or pouting. However, still better than what I would be doing alone.

The nearest town has a library but I'm still pretty sure I couldn't end up productive if I used the study room. The work is coding btw and I'm not disciplined enough to disable procrastination webpages; still I would probably end up binging "Unusual articles" or similar collections on Wikipedia. I guess it there is harm to try the library, though.

Thanks. I'll be trying to push my psychiatrist to do ADHD tests ASAP so I can get productive before the project's Christmas deadline. Until then, this is pretty much the best advice I could be given. Thank you for your empathy.

I sure hope so, vegetables were fine but we barely got any fruit this year. Trees bloomed early and suffered frostbite.

Take life one day at a time

That sounds good. I've been seeing experts for 6 years and not heard this.

You haven't seen my garden and it's quite barren now that the vegetation period has ended for everything outside greenhouses.

Anyway, you deserve a pic so here is one from earlier this year.

(My phone is from 2013 and full of dust)

Don't worry, nothing will happen if you forget your phone at home.

I'm not in a crime-ridden city but a beautiful countryside. I only go walking with my SIMless phone because of offline podcasts and crosswords I'm addicted to. I guess I should go on a longer walk but resist the temptation to actively use the phone, which I carry for GPS logging (not for fitness but OSM).

You're right, I mostly ate chocolate today despite having fruit and a lunch pack ready. I can get pretty unhealthy when I'm out of my mind.

Idk, gay rights in my country are expected to be decided in 1-2 years and I'm pretty sure we will not follow through with gay marriage if America doesn't. Why do I even care so much? I don't even know any openly LGBT person IRL, and just one Ukrainian! Am I too obsessed with Elon facing justice instead of a key government job offer?

I have a semestral project to work on and I've been failing to get anything done for weeks. I'm unemployable until I get better meds or something. Instead of staring at a screen fruitlessly all day, I guess I should just accept this failure and embrace your suggestion. Thank you very much.

Trump isn't worth this

He's a symptom of a greater problem. If a criminal incoherent populist can challenge a future-oriented centrist with decent moral standing except for one or two issues, even by popular vote, I don't see much hope for 21st century democracy becoming what it could be globally.