HappyMoose

some bullying at school and at home

Bullying at home is neither healthy nor normal. Rejection in the place where you were definitely supposed to be safe, can cause these issues. Suddenly every positive interaction means that you are accepted. How do you react to yelling? To making mistakes? Uncovering the causes for these problems can take years but will be worth it. Something your therapist will hopefully guide you through better than an internet stranger. Be patient with yourself, you'll figure it out.

Have you looked at "limerence"? It can be caused by childhood trauma. I haven't found anyone talking about it in the context of autism tho.