MossyFeathers

Pretty shit. Came out of the closet as trans to my parents just before the election after hiding dysphoria for nearly 20yrs (I'm 30). Unfortunately, the dysphoria has been intense enough that I'm so dissociated that I can barely function, so as you might imagine, I'm currently living with parents.

My dad's reaction was basically, "whoever the best you is, be that you".

My mom's reaction was "but you're my son... I always wanted to have a brother and you're kinda like that".

Meanwhile my grandparents voted for Trump after saying they wouldn't, and are now crying about it. Literally. My grandmother was in tears.

So my mom is also dealing with that, and possibly osteoporosis, which meant she said, "it's gonna take time to process this".

Then last night she told me that I wasn't allowed to start hrt until I moved out.

She refuses to let me tell her why I can barely function. She refuses to let me describe what I'm going through. She says she "can't handle it", that "it's not a top priority right now", that she's "trying to understand" why I've made this "choice" while also telling me things like "but I like you the way you are" and rejecting any information I send to her because she'd rather consult her friends that she "trusts more".

She starts to have a panic attack whenever I try to talk to her about it and God forbid I tell her that she made a mistake because then I obviously hate her guts and want her to die. She's literally accused me of that.

It hurts like hell but I don't know how to get out of this situation. I don't know how long it'll take hrt and therapy to get me on my feet all while not having a job. All this while in Texas. I'm fucking scared.

Edit: I also kinda wonder if I was born intersex and that's why my mom is freaking out. I'd think my dad would know and would say something, but idk. I've heard of times where one parent had an intersex kid """fixed""" without the other parent knowing. It honestly might explain some shit if I was born intersex.

This is gonna be like that one mission in cruelty squad isn't it? Where you kill the guy who was gonna introduce regulation to the stock market and all the stock prices immediately start spiking until the news wears off?

I think it's gonna get a lot worse, but if we can hold it together then it'll be smooth sailing afterwards. Basically, I think we're approaching several "Great Filters" and if we can get past them then we'll be good.

If you want to go on a hundred dates with the same person before sexual escalation to make sure someone has pure intentions or whatever, you do you, but it's not typical and I expect that they'll move on after enough time of wondering why they're dating someone that's not interested in sex.

No one said hundreds of dates. Hell, if we mesh well enough then it might only take a single date. However, coming up to me and being like, "hey girl, wanna fuck" is only gonna get you somewhere if I either already know (and trust) you fairly well, you have lady friends who I trust and can vouch for your character, or you're a smoking-hot, literal, honest-to-god anthropomorphic animal person. That's what I'm talking about. And no, I'm sorry, you're not a hot dragon-man. As much as I like to pretend they exist, they really don't.

You don't even have to say it out loud, if that's the vibe you're giving off then I'll get sketched out. If I feel like you just wanna fuck, then the thought that'll be going through my mind is: "can I trust what this person says, or are they only saying things to figure out how to get me to open my legs? Am I safe to put myself in their arms and let them fuck me, or should I be concerned that they won't stop if I tell them to? Will they respect my boundaries and let them shrink naturally as our trust and relationship grows, or should I be concerned that they might injure, abuse or even kill me if I say 'no'?"

One of my best friends said "if I'm on a third date with a guy and he's not made a move, he's probably got a tiny penis". I know that's a horrible thing to say and to hear, but it's true.

*sigh* Here's the thing though, women who say shit like that really aren't worth your time. That's a red flag, dude. That's a sign that your relationship is going to be potentially based on an unstable foundation. Physical appearance is only temporary. What if you get into a bad car wreck and your penis has to be removed? A girl who's only about dick size is going to give it some time before walking away. A girl who's about you will probably be willing to come up with creative solutions to sexy problems and find ways around your lack of manhood (ever considered macguyvering a dragon dildo into a male-compatible strap-on?).

I like a guy who's willing to be vulnerable, who's willing to take his time and so on. My view is that's probably going to result in a much happier relationship than someone who judges based on penis size. Maybe it's just because I'm not in my 20s anymore and most of the horny teenage hormones have worn off at this point (not that they did me any good, but that's another story), maybe it's because I grew up with a Dad who doesn't like to talk about his feelings and was nearly impossible to read.

However, I'd much rather have a guy who's willing to talk about how he's feeling than a guy who wants to fuck on the first date. The latter isn't going to be able to give me a shoulder to cry on, but the former might (yanno, after he's done crying on mine lol; which is not a problem). The latter probably won't share my interests, but the former might.

And you know what, maybe you're right.

Maybe I'm the weirdo here, for thinking that someone who cares that much about your dick size is shallow as fuck and not worth your time. Small peepee just means there's all the more reason to get creative with sexy time.

Maybe I'm the weird one for thinking that there's a difference between a romantic relationship and "a friend you like to fuck" (aka "friends with benefits").

Maybe I'm the weirdo for thinking people need to be more chill about sex for this exact reason; because I suspect that many people think that the feeling you get from sex or lust is what love is.

There's no need for the hostility, though I understand you're probably just lashing out and it's not personal. I hope you feel better soon.

It's the "I know better than you" that gets to me. Maybe you didn't mean that, if so then I apologize. There are a lot of people here, however, who seem to believe they know more about what a woman likes than women do; or they believe that a woman doing what she wants with her body is discriminatory.

For those with a bad understanding of women: women get horny and lonely too, you really think women aren't gonna struggle with this themselves? The only reason I don't think I'll personally struggle with it is because I'm only kiiinda straight lmao. I have other options. Furthermore, however, do you really believe that women don't know what they want? Maybe they just don't want you because you throw up all kinds of red flags.

Learn to be empathetic, communicative, caring and respectful. You really don't want the shallow girls who only care about dick size. They'll just dump you the moment a guy with a bigger dick comes along or, at the very least, you probably won't have a very fulfilling relationship. Sex shouldn't be the goal you're striving for, sex should be something that happens along the way; and guys who act like it's the former are a huge turn-off for me.

I literally just said that what you're talking about turns me off, and now you're telling me that you know better than I do?

Fuck being polite: go shove it up your ass.

It's really not that hard, I don't get it. The only conclusion that I've been able to come to is that guys think being empathetic, polite and communicative will get them friend-zoned or something. That they have to be pushy about it or the gal will just be like, "you're such a sweet guy, I think you're a great friend". You know, friends talk, partners fuck, or something like that.

Does anyone actually say that? I swear I've heard it or something similar before...

...Anyway, no, idiot, you're getting friend-zoned because they're just not into you that way. Being aggressive just gets you shut down faster too because you come off as impatient or desperate, or that you're trying to do the song and dance because you have to, not because you want to. I don't wanna be around a guy like that. That can be very concerning because it can indicate that all you want is sex and you're just trying to find the right buttons to press on the "sex machine". I get it, sometimes you just wanna fuck; but I'm a ~~dragon~~ human being, not a sex machine.

But... If you want a reason why you shouldn't be concerned about being friend-zoned: personally I'm more likely to trust and view someone favorably if they're friends with someone I already know, or they're surrounded by people who have good things to say about them (especially if they're enbies and/or women). Doesn't mean everyone's like that, but if you have lady friends who enjoy just hanging out with you then that tells me that you're way more likely to respect me, treat me like a dra... *cough* human, and that I'm probably going to be safe around you. Those are good things. Those are things I need to feel before I can feel anything else. Again, I can't speak for everyone, but there's a glimpse into how my feelings seem to work, and why I don't think you really need to be scared of the "friend-zone".

Also, when it comes to wanting to "just fuck"; I'm waaaayy more open to that idea if we're already good friends and neither of us are dating someone. Not everyone is like that, I'm probably kinda unusual in that regard, but... yeah.

If I'm not mistaken, his policies are a big reason why Minnesota is one of the big LGBT travel destinations right now. I think he was the governor who signed legal weed into law and supported really strong trans and LGBT healthcare bills that do things like force health insurance to cover gender-affirming care.

I'm kinda in love with Walz right now. Hopefully he'll be my governor soon™. Fuck Greg Abbott. Just hope I manage to get out before Texas fascists go full nuts.

The people trying to leave are the people that the majority of the US voted to sacrifice to the golden bull. Yanno, black people, LGBT people, immigrants, people with disabilities, and so forth.

But go ahead, sit on your high-horse and tell us that it's our fault that the majority of US voters want us dead, okay? Go ahead, how am I personally deserving of my impending fate?

Don't victim-blame, asshole.

You forget about furry porn. Furries draw porn because we like it, not because we make money at it (but money allows those of us who do it to actually potentially live off it).

Edit: or to put it another way, someone drew furry porn and discovered they could make money doing it, not the other way around.

No. He was trying to kill you. Imo any amount of force and any target is justified in that kinda situation. Even if you managed to slice off his balls it'd be justified imo. Granted, if he disengages and you feel safe, then you should stop; I'm just saying that, in the moment, I'm not sure I would have felt safe enough to let him disengage.

Edit: the throat is far more vulnerable than the belly. Smaller target, but significantly easier to damage something in a fatal way.