root_beer

Normally I’d say that I don’t want this to happen to a bunch of people who don’t deserve it, but drinking raw milk is preventable and not contagious, and therefore entirely self-contained, right? So yeah, sow those seeds, guys, I’m totally owned.

[preface and disclaimer: I’m remembering off the top of my head something I read over 30 years ago, details may not be exactly correct]

Not sure whether you remember the chapter of Sideways Stories from Wayside School, by Louis Sachar, in which there was a student who nobody liked, who was a real asshole and wore a stinky raincoat. The kids kept trying to take off his raincoat, but underneath was another, stinkier raincoat, just layers and layers of progressively stinky raincoats, and with every raincoat removed, the kid just became a bigger asshole and his laugh louder and more high-pitched.

At the very end, he turned out to be a dead rat in a pile of stinky raincoats.

That’s what the whole administration is shaping up to be. Except we knew this was coming and allowed it to happen, so I guess that, ultimately, we are the dead rat.

Boom! Mic drop! Stephen King EVISCERATES loser Elon in this EPIC post on X Formerly Known As Twitter!

[gif of that person clapping, you should know which one, everyone posted it endlessly every time Chrissy Teigen or those Krassenstein fucks threw some meaningless shade] hats off to this brave hashtag Resister for doing something that everyone should have fucking done three years ago at the very latest

I’m done, fuck everything, fuck everyone

What if she was just there to sell dick pills, like any normal patriotic American? I can’t believe one would need an invite to sell dick pills! Surely, Mr Tate, that can’t be harassment, can it?

Fuck it, nothing matters anymore; they’ll do “something” and we’ll vote him in again

Who cares whether he’ll be 82 by then, age clearly wasn’t the issue this time

I’m not sure I”m ready to call anyone “trustworthy” at this juncture

I have a sinking feeling a lot will just be skipping the cult part

I’d venture that the same can be said for those who put their hopes in gen z

Who’s to say it’s not just going to be a repeat of the Dubya/Cheney dynamic? Trump’s just gonna sit there eating fish delites and double-fisting diet cokes, rage-watching RSBN, and just soaking, marinating in his filth. Meanwhile, Stephen Miller is going to snarf down a handful of chidren’s teeth for breakfast,* crack his knuckles for forty-five minutes, and decide which urban center gets hit with the first big wave of avian flu.

*he waits until sunset before he unhinges his jaw and swallows a dog whole

Women are too emotional to be president? Shit man, maga and their current figurehead are fueled by extremely volatile emotion, no matter how much they crow about facts vs feelings. Rage is an emotion, and it’s what’s driven the movement for years before it even had a name. Citing emotionality as a reason not to elect a woman is just an excuse—a very poor one, at that—and everyone knows it.

The emoji was standing in for the “A” for “ackshully”

Welp, got my number; I wasn’t fully aware, and that’s my mistake. In that case, yeah, by all means, fourteenth that bastard the hell out of office. Too bad our legislature comprises cowards, halfwits, and enablers.